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Why so many NJ teachers are retiring......


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Recently, a highly regarded 4th grade teacher with around 40 years experience told her class that the tooth fairy isn't real and that it is actually the parents/grandparents who leave the money under the pillow.  Well, a girl went home and told this to her mother who was outraged because she has always told her kids that the tooth fairy is real.  The mother then went on social media sites and bashed the teacher for destroying her child's belief system, contacted the school administration to demand an apology, and went to the newspapers with her story.  I'm confident that a law suit will follow (NJ has so many frivolous law suits that it's a joke, except for those who have to pay since juries here award damages as if they are candy).  What is wrong with these people?  Of course, these same parents are usually the ones who, on a gorgeous sunny 75 degree day, drive their kids the 100 feet to the bus stop so their precious little ones don't have to be exposed to the elements or interact with other kids.  Sorry for the rant.  I'll leave now............

 

Maynard 

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Recently, a highly regarded 4th grade teacher with around 40 years experience told her class that the tooth fairy isn't real and that it is actually the parents/grandparents who leave the money under the pillow.  Well, a girl went home and told this to her mother who was outraged because she has always told her kids that the tooth fairy is real.  The mother then went on social media sites and bashed the teacher for destroying her child's belief system, contacted the school administration to demand an apology, and went to the newspapers with her story.  I'm confident that a law suit will follow (NJ has so many frivolous law suits that it's a joke, except for those who have to pay since juries here award damages as if they are candy).  What is wrong with these people?  Of course, these same parents are usually the ones who, on a gorgeous sunny 75 degree day, drive their kids the 100 feet to the bus stop so their precious little ones don't have to be exposed to the elements or interact with other kids.  Sorry for the rant.  I'll leave now............

 

Maynard

Sorry Maynard but I tend to agree with the parent on this one! As long as the fallacy is not detrimental to the child, just who the hell is the teacher to decide when the student stops being a child?? Now remember that my mother is a retired 1st grade teacher with her doctorate in education and a masters in guidance counseling and my father is a retired school superintendent of the second highest operating budget double AA School system in the state at the time and past president of the County board of education. I say let a kid be a kid as long as possible in this demented society that we now endure. No different than a Bisexual college professor I had that wanted to force HER belief systems on other by making her class extremely vague and hard to pass so that she could extend extra credit for student who would attend weekly Gay, Lesbian, Bi-Sexual meetings that she attended of a club on campus... I am entirely frustrated and sick of teachers and professors forcing their political and religious agendas on our impressionable youth. These are the same IDIOTS that need to stand in public and be publically castrated for shaping young voters minds into pushing their agenda to get the present A-Hole in chief in office.

Roger

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Everyone was out of line. Let the kids figure out when something is make believe and this never should have left their living room, let alone made the news.

 

which is why i now hate the internet. every stupid minute bit of human idiocy becomes national/international knowledge in moments.

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Sorry Maynard but I tend to agree with the parent on this one! As long as the fallacy is not detrimental to the child, just who the hell is the teacher to decide when the student stops being a child??

 

I don't agree with the parent vindictively going above and beyond to squash this teacher but also don't think the teacher "exposed" this harmless fib to benefit the children either.  The teacher had no right to reveal the truth but the parents need to get over it and give their kids a dose of reality outside of their touchy-feely "protected" existence.

 

Bill

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The foundation the argument is broader than any fairy tale traditions.  Educators are correct that parenting and the home life do impact how well a child does in school and parents would rather reserve the right to determine how they raise their families, feed their families and establish family values.  And we have this tug-of-war between the entities.  Educational systems perceive themselves as social support structures collaterally focused on education and feel that they should set minimum guidelines for functions historically set in the home.  They now feed and counsel and direct many aspects of the students life they insist are requisite to learning.  IF they were actually succeeding with this concept it would be one thing.  But generally speaking it does not work.  If conflicts.  As in this instance.  IMHO educational systems do not have the time, nor the resources nor the skill sets to be both parent and teacher.  And when they try to do both they succeed at neither.

 

As unfortunate as it is social stratification exists and systems should learn to do their best at specific chores despite them.  Not every household will be the best for every student.  Those which are criminally bad get referred to the social workers or the justice systems.  But schools need to return to honing the basics of education and stop trying to be a social support network for all of humanity under the age of 18.   

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Sorry Maynard but I tend to agree with the parent on this one! As long as the fallacy is not detrimental to the child, just who the hell is the teacher to decide when the student stops being a child??

 

I don't agree with the parent vindictively going above and beyond to squash this teacher but also don't think the teacher "exposed" this harmless fib to benefit the children either.  The teacher had no right to reveal the truth but the parents need to get over it and give their kids a dose of reality outside of their touchy-feely "protected" existence.

 

Bill

That is your and Michael Rays opinion and is your right, but I wonder if either of you has children as I think you would and should be more protective of YOUR kids, at least I would hope!

This is NOT an example of a set of parents getting out of line by pushing it into the Media! The ONLY recourse a parent HAS is to push this into the media!

Please EXPLAIN!! How else it could be handled with a teacher who thinks she is NOT in the wrong on something like this!!

I lived through an earlier time and SAW first hand, multiple sexual scandal between students and teachers swept under the rug by the teacher being asked to resign and moving on with absolutely non of it becoming public, THAT was policy!!

It may be yours and Michael Rays opinion on this but it is my opinion with a more enlightened view of how this works that you are both VERY wrong!

We absolutely need to hold ground on our belief systems in society and actively FIGHT out against peoples with agendas that we don't agree with, NOT doing so is EXACTLY why this country is in the mess it is in.

I absolutely place blame on the things wrong with this country squarely on the shoulders of like minded people such as yourselves that meet wrong doing with apathy!

Care to debate your beliefs on this matter and I welcome ANY insightful thoughts you may have.....

Roger

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The foundation the argument is broader than any fairy tale traditions.  Educators are correct that parenting and the home life do impact how well a child does in school and parents would rather reserve the right to determine how they raise their families, feed their families and establish family values.  And we have this tug-of-war between the entities.  Educational systems perceive themselves as social support structures collaterally focused on education and feel that they should set minimum guidelines for functions historically set in the home.  They now feed and counsel and direct many aspects of the students life they insist are requisite to learning.  IF they were actually succeeding with this concept it would be one thing.  But generally speaking it does not work.  If conflicts.  As in this instance.  IMHO educational systems do not have the time, nor the resources nor the skill sets to be both parent and teacher.  And when they try to do both they succeed at neither.

 

As unfortunate as it is social stratification exists and systems should learn to do their best at specific chores despite them.  Not every household will be the best for every student.  Those which are criminally bad get referred to the social workers or the justice systems.  But schools need to return to honing the basics of education and stop trying to be a social support network for all of humanity under the age of 18.

Most articulate response I've heard so far!

Roger

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Dude, what? Let's keep this in context of the story - the tooth fairy.

 

I have a 3yr old and an 8 month old. It would be annoying if someone robbed my kids from this piece of their imagination, but it's not something that requires vindication and internet activism. I'd personally remind the teacher of their place in my child's life and leave it at that.

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Dude, what? Let's keep this in context of the story - the tooth fairy.

 

I have a 3yr old and an 8 month old. It would be annoying if someone robbed my kids from this piece of their imagination, but it's not something that requires vindication and internet activism. I'd personally remind the teacher of their place in my child's life and leave it at that.

Michael,

you say this because it personally doesn't rub across your grain as much as say another form of teacher transgression. We could sit hear ad what if the teacher did this or that to death, but the FACT of the matter is that the teacher stepped out of place intentionally and knowingly, do you really think a verbal reprimand from a partent means ANYTHING to a person that would do this at ANY level??

The fact is that these parents felt that the teacher was way out of line, and I fully support that belief.

Where exactly would YOU draw your line in the sand as to how much we allow?

If that line is left ambiguous, it will be crossed again and again...

Give me ANY possible other venues that are going to actually CHANGE this teacher from doing what he or she wants in the future??

Do you think going to the Principal, Superintendent, or the board is going to get this teacher a reprimand??? If so, you had better think again, I know!

Roger

Edited by twistedcrankcammer
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but I wonder if either of you has children as I think you would and should be more protective of YOUR kids, at least I would hope!

 

I have a 10(almost 11) year old son and do make much effort to protect him from the evils that he could(may) be exposed to.  I also teach him not to have a vindictive heart either.  I feel a parent as a good example to their kids, should handle situations like these with dignity and respect and request a one on one with the said teacher to express their displeasure with what took place.  Revenge is never a good thing and never fully resolves matters.

 

There is a clear difference in protecting your children from obvious harm than from something that may hurt their feelings for a time.  I will not say what the teacher did was nice.  It was clearly not.  She had no right at all.  No "crime" was committed only terrible pompous judgement was executed.  For that the teacher may deserve some "discipline" but not total public humiliation just because they have an unrepentant heart.

 

Bill

Edited by willland
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but I wonder if either of you has children as I think you would and should be more protective of YOUR kids, at least I would hope!

 

I have a 10(almost 11) year old son and do make much effort to protect him from the evils that he could(may) be exposed to.  I also teach him not to have a vindictive heart either.  I feel a parent as a good example to their kids, should handle situations like these with dignity and respect and request a one on one with the said teacher to express their displeasure with what took place.  Revenge is never a good thing and never fully resolves matters.

 

Their is a clear difference in protecting your children from obvious harm than from something that may hurt their feelings for a time.  I will not say what the teacher did was nice.  It was clearly not.  She had not right at all.  No "crime" was committed only terrible pompous judgement was executed.  For that the teacher may deserve some "discipline" but not total public humiliation just because they have an unrepentant heart.

 

Bill

I agree in principal with what you are trying to say, but the FACT is, there absolutely would be NO reprimand done by any school system for this UNLESS it saw the light of day!

The school system does not want to rock the boat on something this petty, hell they cover up sex with students ALL-THE-TIME!!! The schools do not want to deal with teachers unions over something this trivial either.

To me, it is clear and simple, this is unaceptible behavior on the teachers part and the parents took the ONLY recourse that would result in a change of the Teachers future actions...

Roger

Edited by twistedcrankcammer
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As I asked Michael, Where is your line as it is presently ambiguous...

Right is Right and Wrong is Wrong, it really IS that simple.

Leaving things ambiguous and not taking action at the beginning of an infraction is what has led us to things such as possibly acceptance of questions and beliefs such as such controversial topics as Gay marriage, abortion, etc.

A clear line needs drawn from the onset and held before it has a chance to become a debate.

So just who gats to set the guidelines on where the line gets drawn?? Obviously you think you do, just as I think I do, because after all it was you that stated they were out of line.... So where do we draw the line Michael???

Roger

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To me, it is clear and simple, this is unaceptible behavior on the teachers part and the parents took the ONLY recourse that would result in a change of the Teachers future actions...

 

Roger,

 

One of the key statements that I fully noted from the OP's opening post was "a highly regarded 4th grade teacher with around 40 years experience".  Now the OP did not mention any past "indiscretions" on the teacher's record so I took that at face value.  Now if it is revealed that the teacher has a track record of this kind of behavior, then my judgement of the whole thing could evolve.  But it would never evolve to the point of public scorn and humiliation.  What would I be teaching my son?

 

Bill

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today, at this age, i draw the line at physical and emotional harm to my children. that will obviously evolve as they grow older and i mature. however, i absolutely want people to challenge my girls, expose them to new ideas, and cause them to question everything. critical thinking is essential and that cannot be fostered in an environment where my children are kept in a tupperware container of experience and exposure.

 

you and i are of different generations. and my generation is exceptionally whiny, over protective, and easily offended - by everything. i am truly concerned about the adults my generation is raising. so i typically err on the side of not being offended by pretty much everything.

 

there's no reason a guy in Princeton, TX should be reading about a kid's spoiled tooth fairy experience in NJ.

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