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Sunday Morning Blues


Edgar

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This is for the other old-timers on the forum ...

 

I've just come in from trying to mow my lawn, with my right foot still bandaged from surgery ten days ago. The grass got so long that the city was starting to eye it for a citation. I managed to mow the front before the pain became too severe to continue. I had to do it myself because I live here alone and I don't know any of the neighbors to ask for a favor.

 

That got me to thinking ... until I was 59 years old (I'm 61 now), I lived a relatively trouble-free life. Oh, I had my share of colds and Flu. Then at 59 all heck broke loose: as simple as a thumb that stopped working because of an inflamed tendon; as serious as heart valve failure; all sorts of annoying things in-between. Fortunately, I survived them all, so far. In addition, in the past two years I've lost both parents and my friends have started dying-off. And then there's the pandemic, which makes it difficult to see old friends and impossible to meet new ones.

 

So I'm wondering, is this how it's going to be from now on? Or is this just a phase, like when a bunch of things go wrong with an old car, all at the same time? I'm starting to feel like the police car in the Blues Brothers movie, that arrived at the county assessor's office after a grueling chase and then fell to dust.

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Even if no one reads it, it maybe time to write your memoirs. I had a heck of a good group of friends growing up that all lived within a few houses away. I only talk to a couple of them anymore. But it gets to be 10+ years to see one of them in person and 6-months for the other. One lives 30-miles away and the other almost 100. Phone calls just don't seem to cut it. Think of both American Graffiti movies and you kinda get close to what my neighborhood was like.

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4 minutes ago, Mighty Favog said:

Even if no one reads it, it maybe time to write your memoirs.

 

What a sobering thought.

 

To someone who lives their whole life alone (like me), old age comes as a complete surprise. I still feel like I'm 25 inside, even though the person looking back at me in the mirror indicates otherwise.

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I'm 54 and my girlfriend is 55. It really bothers me when she talks about getting too old to do things. Of late she's in a mad dash to finish all these house projects because she won't be able to do them again later. She and I were starting a beautiful love afair when we were 16. But a tragedy happened that seperated us that was neither our fault. But we paid the price for 37-years. Now we're together again.

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6 minutes ago, Mighty Favog said:

I'm 54 and my girlfriend is 55. It really bothers me when she talks about getting too old to do things. Of late she's in a mad dash to finish all these house projects because she won't be able to do them again later.

 

I read once that a 70 year old man has better odds of surviving five more years than a 65 year old man. Apparently there's some kind of a threshold between 65 and 70; men who get past it are hardy enough to go on for much longer.

 

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Now we're together again.

 

Enjoy your lives together with my best wishes (and envy)!

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Here's a snippet of what it was like for us. It's a very rough draft and I really want to make into a book. if not a movie (thus the music edit inserts).

 

I started writing mine about 12 years ago and once I met and got back together with Lorrie she wrote her side; although I really wish she'd finish it.

The Lorrie Story Rough Draft Master - Music Insert Edit.pdf The Tommy Story Master - Music Insert.pdf

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5 minutes ago, Edgar said:

 

Enjoy your lives together with my best wishes (and envy)!

 That's what I'm worried about most. I've had Type I Diabetes for 24-years and after doing some research and math I don't have that long to go. Currently filed for disability but if it gets denied after all the appeals, I can only make no more than $20k/yr. so I can keep my Medicaid. My meds run about $10k/yr. 

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You just have to keep pushing past the sore cramped thumbs, sore knees, sore toes, aching shoulder sockets, reduced eyesight, reduced hearing, missing teeth, lower back pain, lower back nerve burning pain, mowers breaking down, cars breaking down, electronics euphoria breakdown, small button syndrome, feet getting cold when it's 80F, and "this world is different syndrome". Also trying to follow your doctors diet plan.

JJK

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1 minute ago, JJkizak said:

You just have to keep pushing past the sore cramped thumbs, sore knees, sore toes, aching shoulder sockets, reduced eyesight, reduced hearing, missing teeth, lower back pain, lower back nerve burning pain, mowers breaking down, cars breaking down, electronics euphoria breakdown, small button syndrome, feet getting cold when it's 80F, and "this world is different syndrome". Also trying to follow your doctors diet plan.

 

I've started making strange noises when I sit down. And when I try to stand up.

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19 minutes ago, Mighty Favog said:

(thus the music edit inserts)

 

You song was "I Like Dreaming". Mine was "My Eyes Adored You", Frankie Valli. No, we never got together.

 

Wow, what a melancholy morning.

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You have a long way to go, just a setback.

62 here and your right, parents, old friends tend to die off, but that's the way things go, it's the standard cycle. We all get a turn, we can only speed it up but nothing to extend it, we can just try. 

6 minutes ago, Edgar said:

 

I've started making strange noises when I sit down. And when I try to stand up.

And you do both slower, yes I know, everything is done a little slower. But the main thing is to keep moving, do something the chair/sofa will trap you and make you feel worse when you do anything else.

Plus it's only been 10 days since you had surgery, that's alot to go through at any age, don't over do the foot but when it heals be active.

 

Not sure what to say really, it's all part of getting old, things change.

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1 hour ago, Edgar said:

 I'm starting to feel like the police car in the Blues Brothers movie, that arrived at the county assessor's office after a grueling chase and then fell to dust.

 

it's strictly emotional fatigue --re-focus your thoughts  , to the better aspects of life , that make you into a  stronger person , which you are no doubt ,  a great intellectual mind , and a person who can self criticize but also who can see that it is just a passage  in time -

 

it is also  the right time to meet with your neighbors ,  get a kid to cut your grass ,and  start making ties with people around you -and life will be more enjoyable as we all need each other , and strangers can become the best of friends

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3 minutes ago, dtel said:

You have a long way to go, just a setback.

 

Well, one setback after another, some very serious, most just annoying. But thank you.

 

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But the main thing is to keep moving, do something the chair/sofa will trap you and make you feel worse when you do anything else.

 

The most troubling thing about the foot surgery was that I couldn't ride my bicycle. Was on the racing team in college -- I still hit it hard; bugs in my teeth and blood in my eyes. The heart problem really put a damper on that, but since the surgery I'm stronger than ever.

 

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Plus it's only been 10 days since you had surgery, that's alot to go through at any age, don't over do the foot but when it heals be active.

 

Yeah, mowing was a little over the top. Too soon.

 

Many thanks for your comments.

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6 minutes ago, Edgar said:

 

Yeah, mowing was a little over the top. Too soon.

 

try to walk , before attempting to run ----it has to heal  100% -before you make any more escapades

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Your going to be fine, I have a feeling I am going to find out how you are feeling soon.

 

Went to the doctor a couple days ago for the first time 30-40 years and she did blood test and a few other thing and sending me to have a few more done.

 

We will see, I figure it's time and the first time to have some of these things done. We were self employed for a long time and did not have insurance, having insurance now might turn out to be a bad thing. I am sure they are going to look until they find something wrong. 

 

But I did pas my goal and am the longest lived male in the immediate family, not that it is much of an accomplishment.  

 

My dad died at 61 a few years after having a heart transplant, and both parents were diabetics.

 

So you can see why I say what I do on the bottom of my post. I told my doctor, it's not like i have tried to take care of myself, she gave me that look.

 

"Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, Champagne in one hand - strawberries with whipped cream in the other hand, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming WOO HOO - What a Ride!"

 

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1 minute ago, dtel said:

I am sure they are going to look until they find something wrong. 

 

This whole ordeal started for me in June 2018, when I found myself taking an ambulance ride to the hospital for what turned out to be passage of a kidney stone. After it passed, the attending physician came to see me and said, "You are in amazing health for a 59 year old. We can't find anything wrong."

 

That jinxed it. After that, so many things went wrong that I have trouble remembering them all.

 

But I'm still here. And I'm still kicking and scratching.

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21 minutes ago, RandyH 000 said:

try to walk , before attempting to run ----it has to heal  100% -before you make any more escapades

Yes! Seriously if you knew or (worse) watched what was done during surgery you’d baby that arena until all was healed. You gotta keep in mind that if you re-injure a recent surgery that it can be tougher to correct the 2nd time around and it may not heal as completely if you’d let it fully heal in the 1st place. This is easier said than done......  plan ahead for these needs. Chores, mobility aides, food shopping and preparation. If you live alone you might even benefit from a stint in a rehabilitation facility before being discharged home.

 

So, yeah. There’s more to come. Plan on it. Plan for it. Getting old sucks......   it always has.

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3 minutes ago, Bosco-d-gama said:

If you live alone you might even benefit from a stint in a rehabilitation facility before being discharged home.

 

I have always lived alone. This is the first time that I've ever actually felt alone.

 

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So, yeah. There’s more to come. Plan on it. Plan for it. Getting old sucks......   it always has.

 

Everyone's stock answer to that is, "It beats the alternative."

 

What's the other quote? "If I'd known that I was going to live this long I'd have taken better care of myself."

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41 minutes ago, Edgar said:

 

 the attending physician came to see me and said, "You are in amazing health for a 59 year old. We can't find anything wrong."

 

That jinxed it.

 -it was not a jinx , but a  bad prognosis -

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28 minutes ago, RandyH 000 said:

 -it was not a jinx , but a  bad prognosis -

 

Perhaps. But we humans tend to assume correlations where none actually exist. Even though my career is infused with mathematics, when it comes to emotional subjects I'm no different than anybody else.

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