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Parental Phrases

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32 minutes ago, Ceptorman said:

Do you want me to tell your dad about this? No mom, I'm good at keeping secrets!

 

I recall one evening, my father had just arrived home from work. He opened the door from the garage into the kitchen, and had not even set one foot inside the house when my mother said, "Do you know what your son did today?" Dad frowned, turned around, closed the door behind him, went back into his car and sat for a while.

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 Moms Husband. (Stepdad, for a while), (Alcoholic 21 year retired Army Veteran & Horses A$$) "Eat it or Wear it"  (One of his nicer ones)

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28 minutes ago, joessportster said:

Mom  "Go get me a switch"

And if it wasn't good enough ie too brittle or too limp She would go get one that would snap even worse!

 

How about:

"Because I'm the parent here, that's why."

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Dad- I think I'll wash the car today.

Me- It's OK, I'll do it.  (dent, scratch, puke and worse sometimes)

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Said by a black woman friend that we razzed about OJ Simpson being guilty...

 

"Ya'll better shut up or I'll smack that white right off your face"

 

"Yall better shut up or I'll slap you into next week"

 

 

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"Cut that fk'ing hair, you look like a beetneck".... I use to have hair the went below my shoulders, it bugged the shyt out of dad. Use to wear a earring with a feather, that I had to hide from dad. Mom was the opposite side of the coin. She was a ER charge nurse for many years before turning to teaching. She went back to college (A&M) and earned her masters when she was in her 30's, I never understood just how hard that is for anyone until I got older. After her masters she taught HS VOC (Health Occupation Education), mom was super laid back, but demanded the best from her students. Of course everybody loved her, even her own students called her mother and would come to the house. Guess who took me to my first ZZ Top, my first Chicago,  my first Rod Stewart concert..... mom, always mom. Nothing seemed to ever bother her, she even let me listen to my own music in the car, Zeppelin, Floyd, whatever. She was the queen of cool.

 

"Tell me who you go with and I'll tell you what you are"..... the usual response I got when I hung around with one of my wildest but loyal friends; Dad never liked him, until he started working for dad. Then he became dad's best friend and dad couldn't go anywhere unless Mark accompanied him.... too funny, LOL.

 

 

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6 minutes ago, Coytee said:

Said by a black woman friend that we razzed about OJ Simpson being guilty...

 

"Ya'll better shut up or I'll smack that white right off your face"

 

"Yall better shut up or I'll slap you into next week"

 

 

I'll slap you naked and burn your clothes!

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