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Should I marry this woman?


Mighty Favog

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2 hours ago, wuzzzer said:

No.  She's a terrible gift wrapper.

 

She brought it in from the porch saying to herself "Oh, there's a big box." The second I saw it I said "Honey, you didn't have to do (get) that for me!"  A few minutes later she said "So, how did you know what was really in the box?" I said "Well, the box looks exactly like the one I was following on e-Bay"

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3 hours ago, Woofers and Tweeters said:

Looks like you'd be marrying up. 😁

 

3 hours ago, Mighty Favog said:

Definitely 

Oh you didn't say any of that at first, OK same answer yes, why not......is she willing ? :lol:

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On 12/15/2020 at 10:40 PM, Jeff Matthews said:

So, when's the big day?

Well, it's a very long story. But our big day was July 10th, 2017.

 

We met in 78' when she was 13 and I was 12. By age 16 (1981) we were falling love.  She got into an argument with her parents for smoking cigarettes and was caught trying to run away from home by our school. The school sent her to a psychiatrist the next day (talk about over reaching). After her appointment, she was waiting for a bus to come home. But while waiting at the bus stop...........

 

.......she was abducted.

 

The man that took her beat, stabbed, had his way with her and was going to kill her like he did a few other girls already. She escaped his car and got his plate number. Before she even testified in court against him, she was relocated with some foster families without telling anyone what happened.....including me; she wasn't allowed to. I only knew she didn't come around anymore. I've been looking for her ever since.

 

In 2017 I finally found her. She had gotten married twice but didn't love either one of them. She was pushed by her court-assigned psychiatrist and the first husband's family to marry him. It was as if she had no choice of anything. Much the same as the rest of his family. For instance: women in their family sit on the floor and not on the couches or chairs. The second husband was/is a severe narcissist. To propose to her he just slid the ring box across the table at a sports bar and said  "Sorry I couldn't get that to you sooner." THAT was his proposal. He also insisted on sadomachism that she wanted no part of. Said it was his fastasy.........for 12-years?? Really?? He was also very violent. With me back in her life, she said to me that I was the only person her heart had trusted enough to believe that what he was doing to her was NOT normal. She divorced him too.

 

I then moved into her house.....together again. We're writing a book but I can't get her to finish her part of it. She just wants to forget the past and live on.

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But, it doesn't look like we will. I never made a lot of money but her second husband did selling cars at a VW dealership. She didn't have a tax paying job for the last 20-years so when she retires, she won't get much. But if she claims part of her second ex-husband's social security right before he retires, she'll do better. If we got married, she wouldn't be able to claim his (the higher amount).

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22 minutes ago, Mighty Favog said:

But, it doesn't look like we will. I never made a lot of money but her second husband did selling cars at a VW dealership. She didn't have a tax paying job for the last 20-years so when she retires, she won't get much. But if she claims part of her second ex-husband's social security right before he retires, she'll do better. If we got married, she wouldn't be able to claim his (the higher amount).

Makes sense.  Nothing wrong with that.  You don't need the government's blessing to be in love.

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32 minutes ago, Jeff Matthews said:

The lawyer in me says...

 

If you intend to "take care" of each other upon death, you should get your estate-planning affairs in order, especially since you will not be married.

 

She's already re-wrote her will and I'm still working on mine. If I was all of the sudden not in her life, financially she would not be hurting. Her house was paid for 10-years after they moved in. My estate is very small with no stocks, bonds or real estate. And only one very small life insurance policy that's enough to put me in an urn. No insurance companies want to write a policy for a Type I diabetic (me) for anything close to affordable.

 

She might not be that book smart but she has a lot of street smarts.

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