Cooking

[justin_tx_16]

Clu, that is amazing stuff! how about some peanut butter balls... yummmmm

You would be amazed at the connections to food here. HornED is a former chef and restraunt owner. My mother and grandmother have and can be seen at least once a month on various cooking shows, mostly my mother now-a-days. Most recently, on a New York City tour she visited the Today Show, Fox and Friends, Good Morning America and several local morning shows. My mother has dined at the Beard House many times and will do so again this summer! That is something I hope to be able to do some day.

Until I was accepted into Mizzou I was going to go to France or California to culinary school. I still might do that after college, people always have to eat ya know!

[boomer9911]

BRING ON THE IRON CHEFS....

Sorry, just had this itch to say that...

To add, DA WO-MAN...thanks eh, and no I never bothered to look, I found it here and was the only 1 to adopt it at that time so to speak, hence I live up North, good match...

[Curmudgeon]

Here's a recipe for ya! Eat `em up!

CAT POOP COOKIES!

(Author Unknown)

Here, by popular request (believe it or not) is the recipe for the

infamous disgusting cookies that look like cats poops

(rolled in grape-nuts, which makes lovely fake kitty litter.)

There are two flavors-chocolate (dark brown) and gingerbread (light

brown).

The author seldom measured carefully, so the amounts may need

adjustment, especially on flavoring. The cookies are dense and

not very sweet, this is necesssary so that they will keep their

shape during baking. If you use white flour or sugar, they may

be tastier but they won't look like poopies.

Chocolate ingredients:

1/2 cup honey

2/3 cup (1 and 1/3 stick) butter, margarine, or lard

1 egg

1 tsp vanilla or peppermint extract

2 cups whole wheat flour

1/3 cup cocoa powder

grape-nuts cereal

Gingerbread ingredients:

1/4 cup honey

1/4 cup molasses

2/3 cup(1 and 1/3 stick) butter or margarine, or lard

1 egg

2 and 1/3 cups whole wheat flour

spices-ginger, cinnamon, cloves to taste (maybe 1/2 tsp each)

grape-nuts cereal

Mix-ins:

Coconut = tapeworms

Chocolate chips = poop chunks!

Butterscotch chips = diarrhea!

Peanut butter chips = diarrhea!

Cooked spagetti or ramen noodles = roundworms

Corn = self explanatory!

Peanuts = chunks

To Make:

Microwave the honey till it bubbles (about 1 minute). Add the

butter, (I've been told using lard makes for a more realistic

texture and softer cookie) and the molasses, if any. Add the

egg, mix well, then mix in all the other stuff.

Add mix-ins of your choice to some or all of the batter.

Chill 1 hour in the freezer or several hours in the fridge.

Roll dough logs of random length and the diameter of cat poops.

Roll logs in grape-nuts and bake at 350 degrees till done

(about 20 minutes, but this varies so watch them.)

Serve in a disposable cat litter box on a bed of grapenuts, with

a cat litter scoop. I hear you get lovely effects by decorating

the box and scoop with melted chocolate or pudding. Brown sugar

might work as a substitute for the new clumping litters...

Mixing brown sugar with the grapenuts "sweetens up the cookie a

bit while still looking truly hideous."

[cybergeek]

Crow Casserole, for the Liberals:

6 Crow breasts

1 quart sauerkraut

6 strips bacon

1/3 cup chopped onions

Brown the crow breasts in a skillet, when browned, place them in a

casserole dish on top of a 1 1/2 inch layer of sauerkraut. Lay a strip

of bacon on each breast and sprinkle the onion on them. Next layer over

them again the sauerkraut and some of it's juices. Bake at 350 deg, for

2 hrs.

Enjoy!

[ShapeShifter]

What!...No Roadkill recipes!

[edster00]

Green Chile Stew

Ingredients:

4 tablespoons bacon fat (vegetable oil may be substituted)

3 large onions, coarsely chopped

3 lbs. boneless pork shoulder, cut into 1/2-inch cubes

3 tablespoons flour

7-14 ounces roasted, chopped green chiles, depending on heat & flavor preference (Baca or Bueno are best; look in the freezer section near the lame frozen burritos...)

3 cloves of garlic, minced (garlic powder works, too)

Salt and freshly ground pepper to taste

5 cups boiling water

1-1/2 teaspoons, or to taste, anise seed, slightly crushed

1 sixpack Modelo Especial, Bohemia, Pacifico or Corona (in order of preference; Modelo will be used interchangeably in recipe.)

Directions:

Open first Modelo. Cut up half the meat. Open second Modelo. Finish cutting up the meat. (Allow 1 hour for cutting up meat, trimming fat, chewing fat with lookers-on, etc.)

Cut up onions. (This goes much faster. If someone has offered to help, the onions are a good way to reward them...)

Open third Modelo. Heat the bacon fat or veggie oil in large, heavy pot over medium heat. Add the onions and cook, stirring, until the they are softened, about 8 minutes. Add the pork cubes and cook the onions and meat, stirring, for a few minutes, until all the meat loses its raw look.

Sprinkle in the flour and cook the mixture over medium heat until the onions are golden brown and the meat is lightly browned.

Open fourth Modelo.

Stir the chiles, garlic, salt and pepper into the onion-meat mixture. Stir in the boiling water.

Stirring occasionally, simmer the chile, uncovered, for about 1 hour, or until the meat is tender, adding more boiling water if necessary. (The chile should have plenty of thin sauce.)

About 15 minutes before the chile is done, stir in the anise seed.

Open fifth Modelo. Send spouse, significant other or some other hapless victim to store for more Modelo Especial.

The chile may be prepared up to 2 days in advance and refrigerated. Let the chile cool completely at room temperature, uncovered. Reheat the chile over medium-low heat, stirring occasionally.

Taste the chile for seasoning. Heat up flour tortillas in microwave (approximately 20 sec. per tortilla) and dip liberally into sauce as desired.

Open last Modelo, toast friends and thank them for their help; savor the flavor!

[Jim Cornell]

Goats Head Soup

I goat head

1 cup red wine

1/2 cup vinegar

1 Tsp Basil

1 tsp oregano

1/2 pound suatee-d onions

1 cup chopped green pepper

2 gallons of water

Let above ingredients come to a boil, them turn it down to a simmer, let it simmer 3 hours prior to setting the head in!

After placing the head in, let cook for 5 hours,till the eyes roll out of their

sockets, when this happens its done!

Then place it in a shallow pan, in the meantime mix

1 pound real butter

1 Tbs garlic

1/2 Tbs Saffron

Heat, let simmer, then base the head with it!

Then

Light a candle, get some Rollling stones on the ole record player, and pack your bowl again LOL

Enjoy