Max�s Taverna-Open For Business

[thebes]

Hey Max, glad to see the place reopening after your summer

perambulation. Man just sitting here I can taste SWABOs Mousaka, hope itll be

out of the oven soon.

I like everything about this place. Wire-framed hard-backed chairs surrounding

metal tables. Moderat-sized room with a

low ceiling, wash-board white walls and wonderful Greek tiles that provide just

the the most subtle resonance of domino tiles as they are slapped into place. A comfortable bar with nice foot-rails,

bursts of sunlight through the windows in the day, and a warm coziness when

candles are lit and the lights drop down at night.

Not overrun with tourists and posseurs either. Just a few strangers from time-to-time, most

through word-of-mouth and some just

wandering in out of nowhere. Almost all

of them pick up on the atmosphere and settle right in.

Ya know Max, a saloon of this type is hard to come bye.

Oddball regulars to give it a some character, neighbors and their families

stopping buy to give it a sense of place, enough women for just a fraise of

sexual tension, and no damn tvs , video slots or other noisemakers to jilt the

mood. Just a dart board, small pool

table and

hey whats that beauty over in the corner there Max?

I do believe thats a vintage Wullitzer juke box. Looks great. Top of the line you say? Holds 1,800 45s. Say I can see you are running directly into

the Tavernas LaScalas. Betcha that boogies.

Whats it cost a play?

25 dracmas for 3 plays, free tonight for the re-opening. Set me up with a retsina and some feta and olives as a place-holder

till the Mousaka comes out.

Damn, Max you got every tune someone would to hear in this

box. I think Ill put an imaginary

quarter in the juke, and let me hear H3, Animals, We Got to Get Out of this

Place

No Max, you know this is my favorite hang-out. Its

just an old rocker tune I used to spend all my spare change on slurping

pitchers in my neighborhood corner bar back when I was a young wolf on the

prowl.

Cant wait until the rest of the regulars show up. Wonder what they will be punching up?

[Travis In Austin]

Off from a long hard day and it is nice to stumble in here. Whoa, look at her over in the corner, think I will go up to the bar, start drinking and find out the story about her. Don't want to get into another skirmish over a crazy bar owner's daughter, this time I think I will get a little intel. first. Who is that crazy guy over there by the juke box acting like he is going to try and take it apart or figure out how it's going to work? He looks strangely familar, can't quite place him but it will come to me. "Hello, my name is Max, what can I get you" asks the vaugely familar tavern owner. I respond with "Well something besides Eric Burdon would be a good start, maybe some early Traffic, and then a Hillas with a Barbayannis Aphrodite Label Ouzo, and keep the Ouzo coming." I inquire about his accent, "you ain't from around these parts, what are you doing so South of Britney." He starts to answer but we hear a big screech across a record and that same strange guy has the back off jukebox, playing with wires. I am distracted yet again, through the large front window next to the door I see the beautiful sun drenched Med., sparkling like a million diamonds of light. I then see something, coming up the lone path to the Tavernia, hard to make out, but for some odd reason I cannot peel my eyes away. I can start to make out that it is two women, closer, hard to make out the faces but the bodys look incredible, it like they are almost . . . TWINS. My gosh, two twin Greek Goddesses, no not Greek, for sure they are tourists-- in those outfits . . . . Where the hell is my Ouzo, and will somebody please change that record? Time to slam one down.

[maxg]

Well well well,

And a good evening to you boys.

Tsipouro is the drink of the day today (actually every day) and the first one is always free. It is a bit like Ouzo (A lot like Ouzo) but slightly smoother and with more alcohol in it. Every one comes with a Meze (small snacky dish - Octopus / Squid / small salad / that kind of thing) so just settle back in the chair and chill baby.

Hope you guys like the view - we're expecially proud of the little harbour for the fishing boats and that are all real tradional fishermen over there - none of that touristy nonsense.

You noticed my jukebox/LaS combo did you. Quiet pleased with the way that one worked out - but I dont think it will get too much play this year with all the live bands we booked.

We seem to have a huge influx of girls from the Ukraine this year - no idea why. They all look the same - 5ft 9 plus or minus an inch - with more than two thirds of that being leg, blond, busty and surprizingly intersted in anyone male. SWMBO is not pleased - but they do seem to be good for business.

Anyway - the only thing is, Thebes old boy, the waitresses. They asked that this year if you could keep from patting their bottoms as they take your order. Sory about that - I suggest a chest rub instead.

[Travis In Austin]

That is so beautiful, would have loved to see the Ukraine girls, but that sight is almost enough on it's own.

Travis

[oldbuckster]

Thebes, Is" Sitting on the Dock of the Bay", by Otis Redding on that jukebox?..........If it isn't ......it should be................

[thebes]

Hey Travis, glad you could make it. Max, his first one is on me. I'll also punch up some Traffic for you.

Yes those are The Twins heading our way. Max is kind of sweet on

them, but SWABO get's a little frosty when they come around. A

pretty typical reaction.

Had to make a flying trip down here with the gals after I got in a

little trouble with them, but they seem much more relaxed after a day

on the beach. I must say they look gret in those tiger-skin bikinis.

When Traffic's through playng I'll put on H7, The four Tops,

"Bernadettee" for me, M3, "Thunder Road" for Tawny and , of course, A5,

"Tiny Bubbles for Tickles. She gets all silly when she hears that one.

Not to many regulars here so far althogh it looks like Oldbukster's got a good start.

I'm sure they'll be along soon. Maybe we should get up a game of 8Ball while we are waiting.

[colterphoto1]

Howdy boys, yes its a great little cantina alrighty, only I don't have so much experience with those establishments with the 'Europa' flair. But these tales come straight from my own twisted past.

It's usually a hot summer late afternoon, humid as all get out. I'm freshly shaved and showered from a hard day of home construction. Swinging a hammer and fit and tan, and with an eye for adventure. We set up the stage the night before. SOmething like 10,000 watts of lighting and a monster tri-amped PA system in this little honky tonk bar near the Speedway track. We're the house band, everyone knows us.

Entering the Starting Line Lounge, the barmaid knows my poison. Round these parts it's a 'set-up' where you're given a stout double shot and a mixer/chaser to do with as you please. Mine's Jack. Just plain Jack. It's one of those down-home joints where if you order a beer, she dips her hand in a galvanized pail of iced down bottles and retrieves a beer so cold you can hardly taste the hops.

The Speed City Rockers will be on later but for now the Wurlitzer will do. A couple of pre-drunk chicklettes are dancing really horribly to some old blues tunes. I saunter over in my best Cuban heels and say 'scuse me ladies'. Renee, this little 5-foot nothing cutie pie, recognizes me and gives me a big hug. Slipping the appropriate coinage or more likely a couple of bills in (cos I like to hear MY music), I look for the first Steppenwolf number I can find. With any luck it's the extended versioni of Magic Carpet Ride. Any numbers by Led Zeppelin or anything our band is NOT going to play go in next. Maybe some Sammy Hagar.

About an hour before the show, I fire up the PA. Our standard theme music was Alice Coopers Hey Stoopid or Joe Satriana Surfin with the Alien.

I get my stool by the sound board, kick back, sip my Jack, and watch the ladies sway to the music. Damn it's Hot! Going to be a long night....

[Gilbert]

What's this I hear! You have some tittle-tattle chesty Ukraine girls behaving in a tittupping and titzy manner.

Well, well well, hope is not lost,... what you need my dear maxy is an official greeter and chest rubber'er. Well, let me tell ya, hope is not lost, because if these hands could talk, they'd have some titelating stories. Just let me know where to send my resume' []

[Daddy Dee]

Retsina, that's a new one on me, but then, I've lived a sheltered life. Thebes, I think I'll just pull up a chair to your table.

Retsina (?ets??a in Greek) is a Greek resinated white (or rosé) wine that has been made for at least 2700 years.

Its unique flavor is said to have originated from the practice of sealing wine vessels, particularly amphora, with Aleppo Pine resin in ancient times. Before the invention of impermeable glass bottles, oxygen caused many wines to spoil within the year. Pine resin helped keep air out, while at the same time infusing the wine with resin aroma. In time the practice of adding resin to the fermenting must have flavored the wine even more strongly, and apparently kept it better preserved.

The Romans began to use barrels in the 3rd century AD, removing any enological necessity for resin, but the flavor itself was so popular that the style is still widespread today. It is perhaps the most commonly-drunk wine in Greece (though not equally popular in all its regions), and, given its strong flavor, is best served with the strongly herbed dishes characteristic of Greek cuisine and Mediterranean cuisine in general. Outside Greece, retsina is also produced in Cyprus.

[thebes]

Ah the crowd is starting to trickle in. Max, hit H4, "Born to Be

Wild" if I'm correct. That ought to make Michael feel at home.

Daddy, restina is very much an acquired taste. It lends wine a

bitter cast, but I have found that with repeated experimentation it

grows on you and becomes profoundly sublime (although that might strike

you as a contradiction) about five minutes before your puss hits the

floor.

Max just noticed the portrait of Samual Clemens behind the bar. A

very nice triubute that, to friends passed who would have loved this

place.

After all this joints all about hanging out, having a laugh, tell a

tall tale or two, expound on the issues of the moment, cast a roving

eye and suspend harsh reality for awhile.

Nobody's got a selection?

Fine, I'll drop another quarter. It's always summer in Max's

Taverna so I think I'll go with Q7, "American Pie" followed with

something for the ladies: P6, "Leader of the Pack"

Once this place start brewing up, maybe we'll do O5, "Duke of Earl"

Duke, Duke, Duke of Earl, Duke, Duke the Duke of Earl...!

[maxg]

OK Boys - some guidelines:

1. Retsina.

Generally cheaper than bottled water over here. Needs some getting used to(!) Best trick is to bolt down the first one so as to shock your taste buds properly and then drink the rest as you would a normal wine.

Bare in mind that there are hundreds if not thousands of Greek wines - the majority not resinated and some very palatable indeed. Best to take your time - try the house white and rose first - then branch out into the labelled bottled stuff.

2. Whiskey.

Greeks - for reasons I have never fathomed - drink more whiskey per heard than any other race on earth outside of Scotland. We have them all - even the bourbons. The good news is that the good Scottish single malt stuff is usually cheaper than the high profile brand name blends.

3. Ouzo.

Nah - I think I will let you find out for yourself about this one. Think Warning warning - Danger Will Robinson!!

4. Tsipouro

See Ouzo. Well OK - I mentioned before that these are served with small portions of tasty foods - meze's. Well guess what - you are drinking 45% alcholol that tastes faintly of licorice, and you are sitting down eating and relaxing - you do not feel drunk at any point until........you stand up. Then the earth re-negotiates its axis.

The problems really start when you sit down with a local. Other locals arrive - they are invited to join - 3 people grow to 12 people. Traditionally anyone coming in buys a round of drinks (with mezes) and measures are healthy.

5. Beer.

Mainly Heineken, Amstell and Mythos. Much of a muchness if you ask me - but I am no longer a Beer drinker. Rather better than Budweizer apparently - for most. Stronger than you might think too.

6. Girls.

There are tourists, Ukranians, Romanians, Bulgarians and most other of the surrounding countries represented. They all speak english and more importantly - sleezy english.

7. Music.

After 11 only Greek Music gets played. When Greek rap starts to sound good it is time to head home. Desist the temptation to dance to the traditional Greek songs - especially on the tables (they are neither as strong nor as stable as they look).

The rest you can work out for yourselves.

[Allan Songer]

Retsina!

Tastes like Pine-Sol, but perhaps a bit drier.

I drank LOTS AND LOTS of Retsina in college. "Acquired taste" doesn't even BEGIN to describe it!

About once a year I buy a bottle, chill it for a few hours and sit and listen to records and drink the whole damn thing.

[Gilbert]

Taste like Pine-Sol.... Barf! I'll stick with Johnny Walker and mineral water.

[colterphoto1]

uggg, I'll pass on the Restina, and the rest of the alcoholic libations- I'm saving my energies for those lovely ladies!

Tell us Max, what are some fave American rock bands that the local ladies might like to bump and grind to?

M

[Travis In Austin]

uggg, I'll pass on the Restina, and the rest of the alcoholic libations- I'm saving my energies for those lovely ladies!

Tell us Max, what are some fave American rock bands that the local ladies might like to bump and grind to?

M

M,

Try the Barbayannis Aphrodite Label Ouzo, light on the anise and is actually a dry taste.

Travis

[Daddy Dee]

Retsina!

Tastes like Pine-Sol, but perhaps a bit drier.

I drank LOTS AND LOTS of Retsina in college. "Acquired taste" doesn't even BEGIN to describe it!

About once a year I buy a bottle, chill it for a few hours and sit and listen to records and drink the whole damn thing.

Allan,

You are a regular renaissance man.. I am continually seeing posts where you mention some piece of gear or music that you own including various libations. You've been around.

[thebes]

Jeez Max it's been too long since I stopped in here. The Twins keep hauling me off to those Eurotrash bars when we're on this side of the pond. You'd think they'd be tired of being mobbed by buffed Mediterranean types with curls hanging over there eyes and those refined aristocratic manners. I ditched them at some local Greek festival. They'll be along soon. Somehow they've picked up some local costumes. Gotta admit there's something about a peasant blouse that sets of their long necks, chiseled cheeks, silky locks, and (ahem) other more prominate attributes.

Set me up with a Mextaca, some olives and feta please.

Is the juke still 3 plays for a 25 dracmas?

Great, I think I'll bring the evening on with Them, "Here comes the Night".

Looks like a bunch of the familiars are drifitng in.

Wonder what they will be spinning tonight?

[dtel's wife]

Dtel and I are so happy to be here. What a wonderful view and to share it with some of our favorite forum buddies. I am a little surprised Colter didn't ask us to make the trip abroad with him. He knows how much we love vacationing and what better place to relax than Max's Taverna.

"I think I will have a/some tsipoura, dtel is the designated driver. Oh nevermind, we can walk to our accomodations from here. "Won't you try one with me dtel?"

As far as the music goes, you guys seem to have a real flair for variety, but so far OB's choice is one of my favs. BTW, Colter, I thought "Born to Be Wild" was your theme song.

"Max, I'll have another....." The night wears on and we all enjoy spending the evening together....what we can't dance on the tables?[:^)] Maybe Michael and dtel can "sturdy" the tables a little for us women.

My sister-in-law just dropped in for a minute...she says she will be right back to join us for a few.....she needs some R & R after reviewing the plans for her new house.

BTW, Thebes, Max and the others....it was so nice to meet you...shall we do this again tomorrow night?

[maxg]

Ah flashbacks.....been a while hasn't it.

Right - the jukebox is all new but it takes Euros now rather than the venerable drachma - its directly connected to iTunes - so songs are downloaded over the all new 24 mb/s interenet connection. Wireless links to the network are free to the customers.

Women can dance on the table that do not have routers on them.

Sorry folks - we have to move with the times - we are now an e-taberna and you can charge your blackberries over there next to the Tsipouro barrel.

Hopefully most other things feel the same - the fish is still fresh - the dress code is in place (dresses are optional for the female patrons) and the music maybe digital but it does go on till 4 am.

Friday nights are live music nights - OPA!!

Otherwise - relax, kickback and enjoy....

[funkyhambone]

"Maybe we should get up a game of 8Ball while we are waiting."

THEBES, i have grown out of this phase. the first step is admitting you have a problem. max, do you have eric clapton in the box? thebes is jonesing again.

may we swim before or after dessert?