Jump to content
The Klipsch Audio Community
Sign in to follow this  
thebes

Hey Kids, It's National EarWax Day!!!!!!!!!

Recommended Posts

Yessireesir, it's that one day each year where we do what our Mom's taught us, not showed us. You know, get clean around the ears.

Now I'm sure your mother, just like mine, would always say after a bath:

"Marty (substitute your own name)! Did you wash behind your ears.?"

"Yes, Mom, I'm a good little boy"

Then, of course, she'd pull your ear, check behind, give a grunt of dissatisfaction. Then she'd grab a washcloth, and give said area a good scrubbing until your ears (and you sense of budding manhood) had turned bright red. But what she had failed to do, was actually look inside your ears, with now obvious consequences.

Sorry to say, over the years, as adulthood came upon us we adopted a regime of keeping those rear ear areas clean and shiny. Sadly, inside those canals hidden gunk began to accumulate. It goes by the name of earwax, and in a worst case scenarios, not only does it affect your hearing, but it can keep those lovely, and very manly, middle-aged ear hairs from growing out properly and giving your sidewalls that proper fuzzy look.

Now for most of society, this could hardly be classified a major disease. However, amongst the audiophile community it was a plague of devastating impact. Afflicted audiophiles, unaware of what was happening, gradually found that music no longer held them in thrall. soon they were taking their wives to movies and their kids to ballgames. The economic consequences were dire. High end stereo gear manufacturers saw there sales drop and were soon trading in their Beemrs for Yugos. The downtick was having a ripple effect across society and having so many male spouses suddenly active in their wives and children's lives was skewing American cultural norms.

I myself was afflicted although I didn't know it at the time. Fortunately, a weeks swimming in warm salt water at a beach resort had cleared my ears of the offending wax and I soon drew the appropriate conclusions.

Acting with alacrity, I formed an association, raised funds, lobbied and cajoled and soon saw passage through Congress of National EarWAx Day. No we go forward on this very day to raise awareness amongst audiophiles everywhere of the danger of that waxy buildup.

Sorry to say our operating funds are still small and can barely sustain me in my role as chief EarWax Researcher. Our goal is to identify new removal methods.

Sensing a buildup in my right ear canal I decided to try out a new experimental device. It's called the "Ear Plunger". Results so far is that it has defiantly removed all the earwax from said canal. There is a minor glitch, though, in removing the "Ear Plunger" A good tug on it results in the "Pop-Eyed Effect" but left in place it acts like a sophisticated tuning fork with a corresponding enhancement of listening between the mid to mid-upper highs.

So please support EarWax Day with a small contribution or chip in so I can get an ambulance ride to the nearest hospital.

Thank you for your support.

post-14801-1381937443115_thumb.jpg

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

At the doctor's office they have this device that can scoop it out for you thebes. However you did mention alternative methods...I would have thought that perhaps the joining of two uninsulated live wires together while standing in water might liquify it for you so it could just run out. As for getting the plunger off, the solution is obvious, Get one of the twins to fire up the chainsaw and cut it off close to your ear...

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

OT, never put he words "chain saw" and "Twins" into the same sentence. They saw your post and giggling, headed out to the garage. When they dragged that saw into the music room and asked where I kept the gasoline, I got so nervous, I must admit, I passed some gas of my own.

Good thing I did to. The resultant pressure drop cleared my inner ear and the plunger fell to the floor. Laughing, they immediately reapplied said plunger ot the top of my head and they are now caling me "Poindexter" and laughing their cute little heads off.

So it's back to the drawing board. Stereophiles everywhere are counting on me to mitigate this serious imparement to our overall listening pleasure.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

A not as refined approach is the old "Water Pik" method, first introduced to me by my doctor's nurse. When she showed me the results, I became a firm believer, and have a trophy of some proportion, they called it ear wax buildup. It has since shrunk to nothing. The sheer embarassment is the prevention.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I find wrapping a wad of cotton around the end of a blunt Dremel tool and inserting into the ear canal has a two fold effect....the heat buildup melts the wax and the circular motion (Rub It) clears it away!!!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

A quick review on the subject of cerumen (earwax) reveals the following. It is a combination of secreted fat and sweat from follicular cells in the ear canal. It derives its ultimate viscosity and color from age, from things caught in it and from relative desiccation. Asian races tend to make less of it while the mentally retarded and the elderly reportedly make more of it. It is essentially fly paper to capture and interdict foreign objects before they reach the eardrum. In typical production it passively exits the canal taking with it whatever was gathered. In hyper-production it can dry out and build up in the canal (impaction). As it occludes the canal the associated hearing loss impacts the upper frequencies first. The lower frequencies are not impacted until the canal becomes 100% occluded. Removal can involve chemical interventions to moisten dry wax and various mechanical tools to aid in its clearance. These include water jets, the use of vacuums (exclusive of toilet plungers) and typical doctors tools like micro-forceps. Doctors do not fish blindly for cerumen extraction. They have specialized scopes that allow them to actually see what they're doing so it can be done safely and in some state of relative sterility. There are several OTC products available to help deal with impacted or dried cerumen. Just ask your friendly local pharmacist. For any so inclined one can collect and save their cerumen for nostalgic purposes or for artistic purposes a la Ren and Stimpy. Should it collect long enough it is possible to have it render a negative casting of your outer ear canal. Yippee!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Less effective than a plunger I'm sure, but my doc suggested 2 parts hot water mixed with 1 part hydrogen peroxide squirted into the ear by syringe (the bigger, the better) followed by a warm water rinse (using the syringe). Done once a month or so, my ear canals are clean and happy... at least until I crank up a King Crimson record.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Someone alert Professor Thump! Cool

Thanks Michael for the warning!

Ear Wax is more important to the web than I would have guessed. We try to ignore it but it is a basic human function. When that auditory orfice goes wrong we become concern quite quickly. I have become more immune to the uky thoughts of ear wax now that I work daily with ear reinforcement audio otherwise known as headphones. What's next hearing aids? Only time will tell.

When I look at the wiki site:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Earwax

I find that there is quite a bit written about cerumen. The most surprising part to me was that there was now medical evidence that supports ear wax candles. I have used them and thought they worked but maybe I was fooled by some snake oil salesman. Wouldn't be the first time. Like that time in Hawaii when I was younger and thought it was Mowi Wowi, but that is a different story.

We can all be thankful for ear wax because it is the human version of a venus fly trap. Ever got a bug stuck in your ear? Now that is upsetting. Now where was I going with this thread. Oh... No where!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thebes, your pictures are just too funny!

I find that my ears produce more wax when I listen to loud music or go to a concert.

I use Q-tips every day, and yes, I do insert them into my ear canal, and yes I know I'm not supposed to, and yes my doctor tells me every year when I go in that I shouldn't do that. But it helps me. I am able to keep a consistent sound quality, I don't have issues with too much build-up, and I don't have ear infections.

I once had the doc clean out my ears and noticed no difference in sound at all.

Greg

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I have always had a problem with ear wax buildup. As a matter of fact I just had my ears flushed last week at my doctor's office. I get this done about every 2 years or so. I fly every week and when my ears have trouble popping I know it's time to get the wax removed. After doing so, it's amazing to listen to the rig and hear the crisp highs again. [:D]

BTW, my doctor told me to never go sticking q-tips in my ears so I don't. I just let it build up until it's time to flush them. Just costs me $20 for a doctor's visit.

Mike

PS. As usual Marty, great thread! I got your email and will be bringing the Zu with me on Monday. Was wondering if we could hook it up to Rich's table on the 15th to see if it's an improvement over the standard 103 (if he's up for it), and then you could see how it works with your table.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

A quick review on the subject of cerumen (earwax) reveals the following. .. the mentally retarded and the elderly reportedly make more of it. I

That explains everything!

A most illuminating discourse in keeping with the finer aspects of this august body. Sure the collecting ear booger comments were a bit over the top but native enthusiasm is not to be discouraged.

Given the authoritative nature of Oscar's post and the in-depth knowledge of our own Professor Thump I propose adding both of them to the National EarWax Association's scientific board of inquiry.

I may have to vet the good Professor though. A persistent rumor has begun circulating that he has added certain subliminal messages to the coding of the software used in the Klipsch earphones. Rumors abound as to the content of the hidden message.

"Number Nine' of course (this is after all a Forum associated with music), the traditional "send me money" (sure lawyers and guns), but my money's riding on:

"Have you flossed your ears today?"

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Just soak your ears in boiling water for 15 - 20 minutes a day.....no fuss no muss[H]

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites


Bloody hell I missed National EarWax Day. I use my extra ear wax to make cadles we have loads of things around the house [Y]

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hey kids, it's that time of the year again.

Do you find yourself poking your little finger in there to clean out a bit grease when the IRS calls to say your taxes are overdue?

Did a city bus just miss you cause you didn't hear it, only caught the oncoming rumble just in the nick of time.

That's why we ahve National Ear Waz Day,. Atime to remind you that yourears are important and hsould be proerly cleasened from tme to time.

Hey, I hate those little syringy things they sell you so I usually go with a Turkey Baster.

How about you?

post-14801-1381973531266_thumb.jpg

post-14801-13819766002344_thumb.jpg

post-14801-1381979295374_thumb.jpg

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Sign in to follow this  

×
×
  • Create New...