bhendrix Posted February 8, 2006 Share Posted February 8, 2006 I don't know where these came from, but they are great. You know you're in a redneck church if: the finance committee refuses to provide funds for the purchase of a chandelier because none of the members know how to play one. people ask when they learn Jesus fed the 5000, whether the two fish were bass or catfish, and what bait was used to catch 'em. when the pastor says, "I'd like to ask Bubba to help take up the offering", five guys and two women stand up. opening day of deer season is recognized as an official church holiday. a member of the church requests to be buried in his 4-wheel-drive truck 'cause "It ain't never been in a hole it couldn't git out of." the choir is known as the "OK Chorale". in a congregation of 500 members, there are only seven last names in the church directory. people think "rapture" is what you git when you lift somthin' to heavy. the baptismal pool is a #2 galvanized washtub. the choir robes were donated by (and embroidered with the logo from) Billy Bob's Barbecue. the collection plates are really hubcaps from a '56 Chevy. instead of a bell, you're called to service with a duck call. the minister and his wife drive matching pickup trucks. "Thou shall not covet" applies to huntin' dogs, too. the final words of the benediction are: "Y'all come back now, ya hear?" God bless and don't fergit ta say yer prayers!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators dtel Posted February 8, 2006 Moderators Share Posted February 8, 2006 Very funny , sounds like you been to this part of Mississippi ? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Duke Spinner Posted February 8, 2006 Share Posted February 8, 2006 my band played at a bar in Tuskarora, NY.... half the guys came on tractors..........[] Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jdm56 Posted February 8, 2006 Share Posted February 8, 2006 AS AN "OLD-TIME" BAPTIST, I AM OFFENDED! I THINK I'LL GO BURN SOMETHING; MAYBE TURN OVER A CAR OR TWO.[] Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
boomer9911 Posted February 8, 2006 Share Posted February 8, 2006 someone say FREE BEER.....SORRY....wrong thread....so confused....[] Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.