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O.T. Curtain Rods


BEC

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The curtain rods

She spent the first day packing her belongings into boxes, crates and

suitcases. On the second day, she had the movers come and collect her things.

On the third day, she sat down for the last time at their beautiful

dining room table by candlelight, put on some soft background music,

and feasted on a pound of shrimp, a jar of caviar, and a bottle of

chardonnay.

When she had finished, she went into each and every room and deposited

a few half-eaten shrimp shells dipped in caviar, into the hollow of

the curtain rods. She then cleaned up the kitchen and left.

When the husband returned with his new girlfriend, all was bliss for

the first few days. Then slowly, the house began to smell. They

tried everything, cleaning, mopping, and airing the place out. Vents

were checked for dead rodents, and carpets were steam cleaned. Air

fresheners were hung everywhere.

Exterminators were brought in to set off gas canisters, during which

they had to move out for a few days, and in the end they even paid to

replace the expensive wool carpeting.

Nothing worked. People stopped coming over to visit. Repairmen

refused to work in the house. The maid quit. Finally, they could not

take the stench any longer and decided to move. A month later, even

though they had cut their price in half, they could not find a buyer

for their stinky house.

Word got out, and eventually, even the local realtors refused to

return their calls. Finally, they had to borrow a huge sum of money

from the bank to purchase a new place. The ex-wife called the man,

and asked how things were going. He told her the saga of the rotting

house. She politely listened, and said that she missed her old home

terribly, and would be willing to reduce her divorce settlement in

exchange for getting the house back. Knowing his ex-wife had no idea

how bad the smell was, he agreed on a price that was about 1/10th of

what the house had been worth, but only if she were to sign the papers

that very day. She agreed, and within the hour his lawyers delivered

the paperwork.

A week later the man and his girlfriend stood smiling as they watched

the moving company pack everything to take to their new home,

including the curtain rods.

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