BEC Posted May 23, 2006 Share Posted May 23, 2006 COSTELLO CALLS TO BUY A COMPUTER FROM ABBOTT... ABBOTT: Abbott's computer store. Can I help you? COSTELLO: Thanks. I'm setting up an office in my den and I'm thinking about buying a computer. ABBOTT: Mac? COSTELLO: No, the name's Lou. ABBOTT: Your computer? COSTELLO: I don't own a computer. I want to buy one. ABBOTT: Mac? COSTELLO: I told you, my name's Lou. ABBOTT: What about Windows? COSTELLO: Why?? Will it get stuffy in here? ABBOTT: Do you want a computer with Windows? COSTELLO: I don't know. What will I see when I look at the windows? ABBOTT: Wallpaper. COSTELLO: Never mind the windows. I need a computer and software. ABBOTT: Software for Windows? COSTELLO: No. On the computer! I need something I can use to write proposals, track expenses and run my business. What do you have? ABBOTT: Office. COSTELLO: Yeah, for my office. Can you recommend anything? ABBOTT: I just did. COSTELLO: You just did what? ABBOTT: Recommend something. COSTELLO: You recommended something? ABBOTT: Yes. COSTELLO: For my office? ABBOTT: Yes. COSTELLO: OK, what did you recommend for my office? ABBOTT: Office. COSTELLO: Yes, for my office! ABBOTT: I recommend Office with Windows. COSTELLO: I already have an office with windows! OK, let's just say I'm sitting at my computer and I want to type a proposal. What do I need? ABBOTT: Word. COSTELLO: What word? ABBOTT: Word in Office. COSTELLO: The only word in office is office. ABBOTT: The Word in Office for Windows. COSTELLO: Which word in office for windows? ABBOTT: The Word you get when you click the blue "W". COSTELLO: I'm going to click your blue "w" if you don't start with some straight answers. OK, forget that. Can I watch movies on the Internet? ABBOTT: Yes, you want Real One. COSTELLO: Maybe a real one, maybe a cartoon. What I watch is none of your business. Just tell me what I need! ABBOTT: Real One. COSTELLO: If it's a long movie, I also want to watch reels 2, 3 and 4. Can I watch them? ABBOTT: Of course. COSTELLO: Great! With what? ABBOTT: Real One. COSTELLO: OK, I'm at my computer and I want to watch a movie. What do I do? ABBOTT: You click the blue "1". COSTELLO: I click the blue one what? ABBOTT: The blue "1". COSTELLO: Is that different from the blue w? ABBOTT: The blue "1" is Real One and the blue "W" is Word. COSTELLO: What word? ABBOTT: The Word in Office for Windows. COSTELLO: But there are three words in "office for windows"! ABBOTT: No, just one. But it's the most popular Word in the world. COSTELLO: It is? ABBOTT: Yes, but to be fair, there aren't many other Words left. It pretty much wiped out all the other Words out there. COSTELLO: And that word is real one? ABBOTT: Real One has nothing to do with Word. Real One isn't even part of Office. COSTELLO: STOP! Don't start that again. What about financial bookkeeping? You have anything I can track my money with? ABBOTT: Money. COSTELLO: That's right. What do you have? ABBOTT: Money. COSTELLO: I need money to track my money? ABBOTT: It comes bundled with your computer. COSTELLO: What's bundled with my computer? ABBOTT: Money. COSTELLO: Money comes with my computer? ABBOTT: Yes. No extra charge. COSTELLO: I get a bundle of money with my computer? How much? ABBOTT: One copy. COSTELLO: Isn't it illegal to copy money? ABBOTT: Microsoft gave us a license to copy Money. COSTELLO: They can give you a license to copy money? ABBOTT: Why not? THEY OWN IT! (A few days later...) ABBOTT: Abbott's computer store. Can I help you? COSTELLO: How do I turn my computer off? ABBOTT: Click on "START." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fletcherkane Posted May 23, 2006 Share Posted May 23, 2006 ROTFL! What a hoot! This one is getting copied and sent to all my friends. Thanks for the laugh! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
colterphoto1 Posted May 23, 2006 Share Posted May 23, 2006 Durn, it's funny, but I thought it was gonna be BEC giving some kudos to my friend and yours, Dr. Who.....[*-)] Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Doc Robin Posted May 24, 2006 Share Posted May 24, 2006 Now that is going to be a classic. Very good. Bill Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SilverSport Posted May 24, 2006 Share Posted May 24, 2006 ...omigosh...Bob's gone completly 'round the bend!...[]...thanks for sharing Bob...very funny...Bill Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SilverSport Posted May 24, 2006 Share Posted May 24, 2006 HeyyyyyyyyyyyyyAbbott!!!...Bill Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
whamo Posted May 24, 2006 Share Posted May 24, 2006 Yeah that's hilarious! Has any one hear ever heard the one that substitues band names for the who's on first skit? It's something like guess who? who and yes and it goes on and on that one's good too. Mark Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SteelerFan Posted May 24, 2006 Share Posted May 24, 2006 LOL, I'll be copying and sharing this also.[] Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thebes Posted May 24, 2006 Share Posted May 24, 2006 Slowly I turned, step by step..... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DaleR Posted May 24, 2006 Share Posted May 24, 2006 That is hilarious![] Dale Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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