BigStewMan

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BigStewMan last won the day on April 11

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About BigStewMan

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    "Suspicion often creates what it suspects. " - C. S. Lewis -

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  1. Gentlemen ... it’s been a privilege flying with you. Movers come in morning -- full day of activities today, then off to a new adventure. Very happy to close this chapter of life and see what comes next. I’ll either post again someday or I won’t; but, I do know that I wish you all well. Steve
  2. Movers pick up the stuff on Monday.
  3. RIP Mr. Cornell.
  4. Made another round of Farewell visits tonight. dinner with some friends from Church...some that i’ve known for over 20 years. At the house of my former golfing buddy--sadly, this feels like the last time that i will see him. He used to be a powerful longshoreman. Shaking his hand was like putting your hand in a vice. 6’5” and strong. Now cancer has ravaged his body and he’s just a shell of himself. He got winded just standing up to take a picture. Cancer started about 7 years ago in his prostrate. Spread to his spine, then colon; Monday they just found out that it’s in his lung. As I gave him a hug goodbye, i told him to get better and come visit me--he said, “i think getting better is out of the question." A very fun evening with a heartbreaking goodbye.
  5. when my heart started tripping out, docs said caffeine can do it. So, i don’t drink any caffeinated beverages anymore. But, i did grow up on sun tea (unsweetened).
  6. Thanks Man ... it’s been a long road thus far. Some here may understand, others won’t. The road hasn’t just been long, it’s been lonely -- ever been surrounded by people yet feel alone? That’s my life. Don’t get me wrong, it all hasn’t been bad--i’ve done some cool things and met some great people; but, when the spotlights not on you, it would be nice to be happy. I’ve faked it long enough. I’m halfway there. a friend that knows me kinda well told me (about me leaving) “you know that wherever you go -- you’ll still be there.” That stung at first; but, i get it -- i have to make peace with myself. I want to do that--not so much for me; but, there is a certain someone that deserves a better me than the me of today. Not that I’m a bad guy--just that happiness has eluded me and i know now that it’s somewhere inside of me--it’s gotta be. I’ll be alright. It’s been a crazy ride at times -- no logical reason why i should still be alive; but, here I am and there is a reason for it. So, while I'm living a life of gratitude, i’m hoping that someday my purpose will be revealed and that happiness will be a part of it. No more Grimaldi the Clown. It’s time to heal man--i hope it doesn’t take long (I’m impatient), who knows, i may end up even crazier than i am now -- if so, I’ll come back to the forum with more stories. I’m rather excited.
  7. Let me answer that for myself. Thanks for the concern; but, no i’m not homeless and i’m not broke. I’ve lived here in this madness longer than i’ve lived anywhere else. The future is a blank canvas, and i’m not sure what picture i will paint. I’ll definitely be off the forum for a while; how long, i don’t know. There is so much that i want to do. The past several years, since my divorce, have been pretty boring. I’m ready to venture back out into the world and start living again--and i sure hope that involves a lot less time on my computer. I got a venture in the works, i got more guitars than i need that should be played, and countless half-written projects to finish. so, i’m fine...thanks for asking. if my travels take me through eastern washington i’ll tip my hat in your honor.
  8. they’d find me--capable bunch, they are.
  9. it’s a place without trouble. Do you suppose there is such a place? There must be. It’s not a place you can go by boat or train. it’s far, far away. Behind the moon, beyond the rain.
  10. Oakland is home.
  11. Marty did have a point...many times, i’ll buy a watermelon and it’s tasteless (the fruit, not be buying it). Does that mean that it wasn’t ripe enough? There have been times that i’ve actually sprinkled some sugar on it to give it some taste.
  12. Not to be confused with MDeneen and his offensive reference to catsup.
  13. i like that song.
  14. i haven’t taken my medicine yet.
  15. i meant YOU are one step away from using the heart icon in a post. Me? The Autumn Wind has no heart.