thebes Posted April 10, 2007 Share Posted April 10, 2007 I've been hearing rumors for months. I'm a skeptical fellow so basically I discounted them. But certain trends in public statements by Klipsch Corp. and a pattern of behavior by various Klipsch spokesmen and employees on the Klipsch Forum led me to investigate further. I've been in Washington for over 30 years and at times have operated at the highest levels of government. This is a town that revels in names such as "The Puzzle Palace" and "No Such Agency". The surface presentation to the public seldom bears any resemblance to actual reality. A deliberate fog is often spread over public discourse and concrete actions masked within the small type of seemingly innocuous newspaper and media blurbs. I've become adept at the arcane art of separating fact from rumor and have reached certain startling conclusions concerning a massive and ongoing cover up at Klipsch Corp. It is now apparent from my investigation that there is a secret vault hidden within the bowels of the headquarters complex stuffed full of case upon case of NOS vacuum tubes. Golden Dragons, 8417's, Blackplates, Telefunkens, and Mullards by the ton. Should Klipsch ever become a publicly held company, they would have to list these tubes as an asset thus immediately propelling them in the ranks of the Fortune 100. Existence of the horde has been cleverly hidden through a dis-information campaign promoting Solid State amps as the best choice for their speakers. The purchase of Aragon was was part and parcel of this vast conspiracy. Trey's often stated preference for SS was simply a mask. It was used to hide the fact that all senior Klipsch employees have hidden panels in their homes. When a button is pushed the SS slide out of the way and a massive array of tube powered gear slides quietly into place. Michael's Colter's sudden interest in exploring tubes was a cleverly designed foil to distract me from the truth. The ultimate proof however, is BerryBoy's release of the Jubilee. The back story on this is that when The Corporate Suits got wind that my moles and ferrets had revealed that certain individuals were spending far too much time inside the Anorexic Chamber they released the Jubilee. They stated it had been finalized through the extensive use of this Chamber. They hoped to hide the fact that the Secret Tube Vault is located beneath this Chamber and is accessed via a sliding panel and the incantation of masonic-like code words. I have held my findings closely for some time but certain developments have lead me to fear for my life. I've been the subject of knowing nods between The Twins . Recently they claimed they were flying to Los Angeles to visit with their "Uncle Bob" but their cancelled tickets listed the destination as Indianapolis. I fear they have been turned. The other day the breaks on my car failed just at the top of that steep hill near my house. Thus my precipitate action to reveal this nefarious plot in hopes that by going public my life will be saved and the clamor of the needy masses will result in the vault being throw open for us those most faithful folowers of Klipsch. This is not an urban myth. Should this be my last post, let it be known that my last thoughts were of you, my fellow forum members. The Great But Maybe Late Thebes Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
filmboydoug Posted April 10, 2007 Share Posted April 10, 2007 Thebes, watch out... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Islander Posted April 10, 2007 Share Posted April 10, 2007 Hilarious, both of you! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators dtel Posted April 10, 2007 Moderators Share Posted April 10, 2007 " I've been in Washington for over 30 years and at times have operated at the highest levels of government." There's the scary part ! [] Now that explains where you get the knack for [bs], I originally thought you were a writer / novelist, but no, just hanging around with politician types ! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RFP Posted April 10, 2007 Share Posted April 10, 2007 Now that explains where you get the knack for [bs], I originally thought you were a writer / novelist, but no, just hanging around with politician types ! Sure, but we like Thebes ! Cant say as much for those politician types. [^o)] Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Klipsched with Yamahas Posted April 10, 2007 Share Posted April 10, 2007 OK, that does it.........a write-in for Thebes as PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES! Afterwards, you can publish your memoires and make MILLIONS. While your at it, think you could find your way to straighten out the National deficit? What's with this SS and Tube stuff I hear?[:#][*-)] Signed Your humble supporter Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
oldbuckster Posted April 11, 2007 Share Posted April 11, 2007 Klipsched, I second the nomination, the Northern Country New Yorkers Support THEBE's for President.......However Thebe's, my support for you depends on you supporting me for, Music Administrator.................Deal ???????? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BigBadBabyBoomer Posted April 11, 2007 Share Posted April 11, 2007 Many years ago I was visiting my cousin at his workplace in an IBM plant. He suddenly received a "rush order" from his boss for a completely new set of briefing slides to be used in less than 30 minutes. We rushed down the hall to a room requiring a key - which he produced. Inside were two MacIntosh computers. He had the slides finished in about 15 minutes - and made the boss very happy. Since he has retired I feel my oath of secrecy is fullfilled....and that's the rest of the story! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mas Posted April 11, 2007 Share Posted April 11, 2007 Macs were composed totally of IBM technology, starting with SCSI that enabled the plug and play character from day one. And then Motorola and IBM merged their chip technology and Apple continued to use it up until it was not advantageous for IBM to develop low end desktop CPUs - when Apple wisely switched to the commoditized X86 platform. The irony is that the Mac was actually the true IBM clone! By the way, the Quadras of the mid 90s were simply clones of the then IBM RS6000 43p desktops utilizing the venerable 604e CPU with the addition of a prom with the OS burned in firmware allowing for a much faster boot than the arcane DOS based Windows. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators dtel Posted April 11, 2007 Moderators Share Posted April 11, 2007 Klipsched, I second the nomination, the Northern Country New Yorkers Support THEBE's for President.......However Thebe's, my support for you depends on you supporting me for, Music Administrator.................Deal ???????? I like THEBE's, and I know what kind of music OB likes , sound's like a done deal IMO . [Y] And just think this country will have first twins for first ladies ! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Klipsch Employees Trey Cannon Posted April 11, 2007 Klipsch Employees Share Posted April 11, 2007 Now now, we would never do something like that.[A] Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thebes Posted April 11, 2007 Author Share Posted April 11, 2007 President! Then everybody's gunning after you. Thanks Doug, I'd been losing sleep with a lot of activity over my house at night. Thought it was a police helicopter. Now I know. Was I the only one who noticed the hijack attempt on this thread? Seemingly innoucous computer commentary. Obviously part of the disinformation campaign. IF YOU THINK I CAN BE SCARED OFF BY PUTTING A BULL'S EYE OVER MY AVATAR, well, uhm, I guess you're right. If this is it, I go gladly knowing that my fellow forum members will take up the crusade to get our hands on the Klipsch Secret Tube Stash. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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