space_cowboy Posted September 21, 2004 Share Posted September 21, 2004 As much as I hate to admit it, I'm in deep kaka with the alcohol. I'm really losing control. Any members have advise or info.? Thanks, Mark Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
3dzapper Posted September 21, 2004 Share Posted September 21, 2004 Mark, Congradulations for taking the first step, admitting that you have a problem. The next is to go out and find the help you need. Go to a local AA group and seek council. AA has helped many to combat their personal demon. Good luck and keep a positive attitude. You can do it!!! Rick Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Speedball Posted September 21, 2004 Share Posted September 21, 2004 My Dad had a serious denial problem with it most of his life as well as my older Brother who I have not seen in 10 years or so. At work Ed went to some place for a few weeks to kick the bad habit and has since been a whole new person. My younger brother....I just wish he would quit that d_ _n smoking.....man that stinks. ..Pat Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PhilMays Posted September 21, 2004 Share Posted September 21, 2004 AA works well as long as the program is completely followed. My best friend passed away from alcohol addiction. He was in denial and would pick and choose the steps he wanted to take. I offered to pay for his rehab in another state and help take care of his family while he was away, but again he was in denial as to how "deep" he was in. AA works excellent if you follow their steps!!! Good luck, my heart bleeds for you! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
picky Posted September 21, 2004 Share Posted September 21, 2004 Mark: Regardless of how much luck other members have had with AA, it is in the best interest of you and those who love you for you to take the initiative to begin attending the AA meetings as soon as possible and continue to do so faithfully. Had my own father done so he probably would still be here today to meet his 25 year-old grand daughter for the first time and hold his great-grandson and to give me his advice on the tough rigors of life, instead of selfishly drinking himself to death at the age of only 58! Only you can make that difference and you have already taken the first step, my friend. God go with you. You will do it! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Speedball Posted September 21, 2004 Share Posted September 21, 2004 Picky.....They missed out on so much. I know exactly what you are talking about. ...Good day.....Pat Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
picky Posted September 21, 2004 Share Posted September 21, 2004 Thanks, Speedy. You're so right. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mighty Favog Posted September 21, 2004 Share Posted September 21, 2004 Even though I don't drink (at all and never have), time ang time again I have heard that the only thing in your life you have to change is everything. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
space_cowboy Posted September 21, 2004 Author Share Posted September 21, 2004 Thanks friends, it's in my court now and has been been for a while, thanks for your thoughts. Mark Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
space_cowboy Posted September 21, 2004 Author Share Posted September 21, 2004 . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WMcD Posted September 22, 2004 Share Posted September 22, 2004 Dear Mark, Naturally, it is best to first follow conventional wisdom. Get into some program, or do something to help yourself. You deserve it. This is because you are a magnificent fellow. It might be AA or it might be a shrink. Depends on what you can afford or what you're comfortable with. In my view, and experience, alcohol is what nice, polite, cultured, and intelligent people, do to suppress some nominally ugly emotions of anger and rage. As hackney as it sounds, you have to "get in touch with your emotions." The problem, I suspect, is that you don't like being less than first class noble. You may well not allow the emotions. So if the job, girl friend, family, etc. do somethings to you which are really ignoble or maddening . . . we want to be white knights, none the less. Unfortunately, it doesn't work that way in our brain. Of course, some of the stressors are inevitable and seems to not be a comment on your value as a human being. Death of a loved one (the dead didn't like it either), loss of a job (the industry is going through it), S.O. finds a new love ("It is not you, it is me.") It is not anything at fault with you, or anything you can do about. So you're not entitled to *****. That is a joker in the pack. You are not allowed to be angry or hurt. But we are. It would be impolite; so we don't do it. It is funny. I visited a college buddy many years ago, stepped into his Triumph Spitfire with a leaky roof on a rainy day. He asked, "How are things going?" For some reason, my mind did a core dump. I said things about my job which I'd never, ever expressed. They were ugly. Okay, I did my own little core dump here too. The bottom line is that, IMHO, your going to have to take a hard look the emotional stuff which bugs you and drives anyone to the oil. In this, privately, your desires may be money, good employment, true love good sex, good parents, a winning base ball team (smile). You get the picture. You might want to buy a good ax and pile of logs. Put the pictures of your frustrations on the logs and chop at them, with the knowledge that it is transferance. Smile. And wishing you the best insights in to what is bugging you. Gil Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WMcD Posted September 22, 2004 Share Posted September 22, 2004 Whoops, The good computer server sensored an offensive word and substituted ****. You are not entitled to complain or 'vetch, was the thought. Any reference to our good canine female frends was not intended. Human too. I'm still annoyed that room t-r-e-a-t-m-e-m-t can not be stated because of the e-a-t m-e in there. "Thou shall not make machines in the image of man's minds." Gil Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Daddy Dee Posted September 22, 2004 Share Posted September 22, 2004 Mark, The insight you already have is vitally important. Good for you to realize this. Get to a meeting. There is alot of recovery in AA and you will find the 12 steps grounded in the right spiritual principles and it's a place of honesty. Recovery is all about honesty. You will have the kind of support you need for living. Keep hanging in there. It works if you work it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fini Posted September 23, 2004 Share Posted September 23, 2004 Just curious: Is AA non-denominational? I know it's faith-based, but is it supportive of non-Christian faith? Agnostics (being, in my mind, those who are comfortable with the "mystery"...)? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Klipschfoot Posted September 23, 2004 Share Posted September 23, 2004 It's good that you have come forward. Regardless of what your wakeup call was, realize that you have the power within you to change but the support of others is necessary to make it last. Every day sooner that you make a change, is one more day lived in freedom. I met an old friend years ago who had made the change. Having a few drinks every night just to "relax" and "get a buzz" was not so innocent as he fooled himself into believing. AA helped him and he was a changed person. I'll keep you in my thoughts. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eq_shadimar Posted September 23, 2004 Share Posted September 23, 2004 Mark - I have witnessed the affects of alcoholism and addiction on many people in my life. One is my father who refuses to admit he has a problem yet comes home from work and gets drunk. Now that he has just retired it is worse. My step mother is boardline herself so she does not help the situation. Growing up with this situation was not fun. In fact it helped steer my older sister to alcohol and drugs. She was lucky enough to get some help through AA shortly after college and has been clean and sober for over 12 years now. She refuses to visit my Dad for the obvious reasons. I also have a good friend Sean from high school who I rank among my closest friends. We would talk all the time and he would tell me about how drunk he got, or how stoned he got, or how many drugs he took. I often said to him that he should take it easy but it fell on deaf ears. About 2 years ago he went to a concert with some friends that were all very fu*ked up. Some stranger offered them all some unknown pill saying "it will be the high of your life". They were all more then willing to take it to the next level. For Sean this was his breaking point. He told me that he sat there and thought "Damm how out of control am I that I will take drugs from a complete stranger". So the others took it and did have a fun time (no one died or anything) but he got himself into AA and therapy after that and has been sober for about 18 months now. I guess my point in all this is that no matter how deep your addiction is once you get to the point where you say "hey this is fu*ked up. What am I doing to myself, family, and friends?" that you should seek professional help and through that help you will be able to overcome the addiction and get your life back. If you need anything please feel free to contact me. It takes a lot of guts to post something like this on a public board. Hopefully we can all help you out. Laters, Jeff Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hightone Posted September 24, 2004 Share Posted September 24, 2004 fini Yes what ever religon you are or are not is perfect. The only requirement is a desire to stop drinking. You don't have to change anything but if you stick with it everything will change. It takes an outstanding amount of effort to drink every day. Lots of meetings in your area. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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