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A HUMBLE APOLIGY


tim3

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I need to stay on my meds!!!

If I happen to visit GLA51 when you do, maybe we could swap a few? (just kidding people, I'm not that nuts though there's a lot of times I think I'd be better off without so many meds)

Shooting a large format box camera isn't being a dork, that's being an artist. And the images you've posted here are stunning.

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I think I used basic HTML when I've used my daughter's macbook. Just a simple <br><br> (<br> is break) will give a blank line.

The first <br> ends the current line. The second <br> ends the blank line.

Has also worked for me when my editor plug in doesn't work in Internet Explorer on work machine or FireFox on home machine. ALL CAPS IS SIMPLE TO FIX. BUT SOME PEOPLE LIKE ALL CAPS. I DON'T. But I've got better things to do to worry about someone who might like all caps. Or like to SHOUT at people if that's how they interpret all caps. But ALL CAPS may be easier for some people to read or type. No big deal.

So, if I start complaining to people who use all caps, slap me a good one or hook me up with one of those electroshock collars like we threaten Coytee with at the Pilgrimage.

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Insert foot in mouth [:$]

Sorry about that Tim......we joke around so much...we tend to forget that there are folks dealing with real life issues...

I hope all goes well for you next week

oh yeah and before you go in for treatment...write yourself a big note and put it on your bathroom mirror, so you will remember this when you get home:

"Send All Klipsch and Associated gear to Fenderbender...he payed you last week"

there I go again...sorry just couldn't help myself...boy I'm a jerk!!! well hope you got a laugh at least....

Good luck

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Insert foot in mouth Embarrassed

Tim,

[:$] Insert both my feet in mouth. I've never had ECT but have had some meds to battle depression that didn't quite worked as the doctor hoped - quite a bit in the opposite direction - think brain on hyperdrive. Let's just say that if I didn't meet my guardian angel on a trip home from Detroit that was supposed to last a few days longer I quite likely won't. Thankfully I'm all better now (ok, all better is debatable...)

My thoughts and prayers are with you. I hope and pray that things get back to where they should be.

"Send All Klipsch and Associated gear to Fenderbender...he payed you last week"

Dang it Fender... so that's how you got all my Klipsch stuff. I still can't find where you paid for it... are you sure about that.

sorry Tim, I can't help myself either.

Seriously. You're in my thoughts and prayers to get through this. ECT looks like very serious stuff. I hope and pray it does what it's supposed to.

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I shouldn't kid at all....God knows I've been on enough meds...my pituitary is damaged, and I need to be on synthetic testosterone or I get deeply depressed ...then the test builds up in my system and my adrenals go on overdrive and I experience extreme manic episodes!! I've got to watch closely or I'll go hide in a cave or try to stack 4000 tires in a row so the shadow people don't get me.....

they have me on a good cocktail at the moment..compelled to work out every day..that helps a lot, but I'm suffering badly arthritic knee so it's put a damper on the workouts.....

but for real my mother was institutionalized when I was younger and she was subject to many rounds of ECT.....she's doing pretty well for the last 15 years so something worked.

So my thoughts are with you Tim

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I shouldn't kid either Tim.

No long term meds today but too much of not quite the right thing a few years ago would send my mind into hyperdrive... not overdrive but hyperdrive. I can't even talk as fast now as I did when that really kicked in even if I try. The scary thing was I could back up and explain it to my poor co-workers who got lost after the 1st 30 seconds and it still made sense. Though focusing on 1 or 2 tasks just didn't happen at times. Mind jumped back and forth like a pinball from one thing to another, picking up right where it left off several minutes even up to a half hour in the past. It's a wonder things just didn't short circuit... Man if one could learn to harness that.

And you can speak before you think. In my case, the mechanism that causes one to bite one's tongue would be running about 5 to 10 seconds behind (oh, oh, I can't believe I just yelled that at my manager.... but if it was in hyperspeak they probably didn't understand).

Don't know much about ECT but my thoughts and prayers are with you.

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I'm not asshamed to admitt as I write this,tears swell my eyes.You fellas are a great bunch of guys & God bless you you for your best wishes.I've been on over 70 different meds. for my severe depression & bipolar.You see guys,I feel that God gave me the gift of a child,one child & I blew it.I should have been there to prevent his death & I was'nt & now I'm paying dearly everyday.I thank you all so much for your kind words,but to be honest I wish I could just be reunited with my little boy.It's not natural for a parent to bury their child.Thanks again,Tim.

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... I feel that God gave me the gift of a child,one child & I blew it.I should have been there to prevent his death ... It's not natural for a parent to bury their child.Thanks again,Tim.

I had forgotten that Tim. It's not natural for a parent to bury their child. I'm not sure God punishes us for things we did or didn't do. In all likelihood there was nothing you could've done but even if there was you maybe weren't able to at the time. Somehow you've got to quit blaming yourself. And if life is not one big illusion you will be reunited with your boy and other loved ones for all eternity. I wouldn't wish that pain on my worst enemy.

One of my cousins crashed into a tree on his way home several years ago at the age of 19. Another cousin lost a daughter in her low twenties who had battled illnesses her whole life. I still don't know how they get through each day. My cousin was like a brother to my brother and me. Still a big whole in my heart even though it's been over 15 years.

Just take it one day at a time. I know that's easier for the rest of us to say than someone living with that kind of tragedy but that's the best any of us can do.

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Hi Tim--as a father of four, my heart hurts for what you endured. I stood with my brother as his only son was removed from life support.

BUT, you really need to know that God IS in control. When your son died, it wasn't something you did or didn't do, and life hadn't spun out of God's control either. He had a reason for allowing that to happen, and although sometimes it's hard to accept, we don't always know or understand why. Perhaps, there could be some forum member reading this thread and pondering the weighty issues of life, death, and God; and i think it's pretty incredible to know that your son could have a positive impact on the lives of those that read this thread. Somebody could be ultimately end up with a personal relationship with Jesus Christ that was sparked by this very conversation on this forum, and who knows how many people's lives that person will in turn influence. Try to take comfort in that my friend--We serve a good God and He does know what He's doing.

Kindest regards,

Steve

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Tim,

I lost my wife to cancer three years ago this Christmas. If I'm not careful, I want to second guess everything I ever said and did with her. Being a little introspective is not a bad thing in and of itself, but a person can go overboard. We just had the Grace to be able to spend time together before she was gone. She really wanted to attend Christmas Eve Mass, but by the time the weekend came, she didn't know what day it was. I have learned, though, that I personally had to let go before I could move on. Do I miss her? Absolutely! And even though I have a girlfriend now, they aren't in competition with each other. I have lots of great memories, and pray I always will. But God, in His infinite wisdom, calls us went He wants. We don't understand, perhaps will never understand. I will praise Him and worship Him anyway.You will be in my prayers.

This forum has a great bunch of guys who were here for me during her illness and afterwards. They have become like family, warts and all.

Bruce

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Tim

I'm very sorry about your son and can't imagine the pain you are in.....

Call it God, fate, Karma, the universe, what ever.....I call it life,.and life puts things in your path and you can't always find a reason for it. It's not the hand we are delt ,but how we play out the cards, bluffing, calling and raising until the last chips are played , that make the man.

I know that guilt and shame are a horrible burden.......the shame tells you that you are a bad person for letting bad things happen to your son, but you are not a bad person...just a person that bad things happened to.......

Forgive yourself and you will find peace and maybe see a reason for this tragedy ... and hopefully will be able to touch other peoples lives in a positive manner.

you will be in my thoughts.....

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