CECAA850 Posted May 31, 2011 Share Posted May 31, 2011 i think it's time for me to meet more. I'm really sorry, but you are making me laugh. that's okay bruce...i'd love to hold a woman at night instead of my guitars. They're cheaper if you just rent them. Just sayin..... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Groomlakearea51 Posted May 31, 2011 Share Posted May 31, 2011 i think it's time for me to meet more. I'm really sorry, but you are making me laugh. that's okay bruce...i'd love to hold a woman at night instead of my guitars. They're cheaper if you just rent them. Just sayin..... The guitars or the women? [6] Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators dtel Posted May 31, 2011 Moderators Share Posted May 31, 2011 You can always resell a guitar. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BigStewMan Posted May 31, 2011 Share Posted May 31, 2011 You can always resell a guitar. i used to think that way about speakers until i noticed a stack of H1s and H2s sitting in the corner of my living room collecting dust. I'm not using them and i can't bring myself to sell them. Don't think I'll sell any guitars ever either, or my slot machine, or my traffic light... Oh man, i need help. Where's Mr. Wizard when you need him? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Islander Posted May 31, 2011 Share Posted May 31, 2011 Here are 15 reasons why guitars are better than girlfriends: 01. Girls dump you. A guitar will always be there when you get home. 02. A guitar's minimum requirement is an amp. A girl's minimum requirement is shoes, clothes, makeup, a mirror, magazines, more shoes and a tiny handbag. And that's every week! 03. You'll never turn on a girl as fast as you can turn on an amp. 04. If your guitar sounds crap, you can tune it. If your girl talks crap you're stuck with her. 05. Guitars, unlike girls, have a volume control which goes all the way down. 06. If you play your guitar crap, it tells you it's crap. It doesn't lie and pretend you did it right when you didn't! 07. Two girls at once is hard to come by. Double neck guitars are not. 08. Your guitar makes a sound only when you want it to. 09. Nobody cares when you dump your old, out of date guitar for a new, younger model. In fact it's encouraged. 10. With a guitar, you can copy tunes from other songs. With a girl, try telling her you're copying some moves from an ex and she'll throw you out. 11. Your guitar doesn't refuse to let you play it once a month. 12. Your guitar will never find out if you've been playing another guitar behind its back. 13. You don't have to get guitars drunk before using them. 14. You can stare at a guitar all you like, but stare at a girl too long and you'll end up in an immense amount of pain. 15. Watching other people play the guitar is entertaining. Watching other people do it is just sick! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Islander Posted May 31, 2011 Share Posted May 31, 2011 Hmm, that seemed a little imbalanced. Here's the situation from both sides: REASONS WHY GUITARS ARE BETTER THAN WOMEN 1. A guitar has a volume knob. 2. If you break a guitar's G-string, it only costs $.79 for a new one. 3. You can make a guitar scream as loud as you want it to. 4. You can unplug a guitar. 5. You can finger a guitar for hours without it complaining it wants more. 6. Other people can play your guitar without it getting upset. 7. You can finger a guitar in public and get applause, not arrested. 8. You can have a guitar any color you want and no one will care. 9. You can make your guitar as tight as you want it just by turning a peg. 10. If your guitar doesn't make sounds you like, you can return it. 11. You can use four fingers at a time on a guitar. 12. If your guitar strings are too heavy, you can just get a lighter set. 13. You can have a guitar professionally adjusted to *your* liking. 14. If you scratch a guitar's back, it's unintentional, not required. 15. You can go to a guitar shop and play all the guitars you want for free. 16. It's good to have a guitar that's stretched out. 17. You can take lessons on how to play a guitar without feeling embarrassed. 18. You can rent a guitar without worrying about who rented it before you. 19. You can play the guitar with your bare fingers and no protective covering. 20. You can get rich playing a guitar, not broke. 21. A guitar doesn't take half of everything you own when you sell it. REASONS WHY WOMEN ARE BETTER THAN GUITARS 1. Women are more fun when the power goes out. 2. You can't get your guitar wet. 3. Ever try to screw a guitar? 4. The input to a guitar is only 1/4". 5. A guitar won't beg to be played. 6. It's no fun to tie your guitar to a bed and spray whipped cream on it. 7. When playing a guitar, you can use your teeth, but not your tongue. 8. Guitars aren't very aggressive. 9. A guitar won't play you back. 10. You need two hands to make a guitar scream. 11. A guitar won't scratch *your* back. 12. A guitar won't drive you home if you're too drunk. 13. A guitar doesn't care who plays it. 14. You can't play two guitars at once. 15. You can't fall in love with a guitar (well, maybe you can, but they can't love you back). 16. It's a lot more fun to stretch out a woman than guitar strings. 17. Guitar lessons aren't free and aren't as much fun. 18. If you really *do* want little guitars, you have to buy them. 19. You can't marry a rich guitar. 20. Even a good guitar won't usually last a whole lifetime. 21. Guitars don't taste very good. 22. A guitar won't give you head. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CECAA850 Posted May 31, 2011 Share Posted May 31, 2011 A woman looks better in a g-string. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gnatnoop Posted May 31, 2011 Share Posted May 31, 2011 A woman looks better in a g-string. not always... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marvel Posted May 31, 2011 Share Posted May 31, 2011 The more women I meet, the more I realize how good the choice I made was the right choice. [] Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CECAA850 Posted May 31, 2011 Share Posted May 31, 2011 A woman looks better in a g-string. not always... PLEASE don't post a pic to prove your point. I'll conceed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Islander Posted May 31, 2011 Share Posted May 31, 2011 A woman looks better in a g-string. not always... PLEASE don't post a pic to prove your point. I'll conceed. Agreed! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gnatnoop Posted June 1, 2011 Share Posted June 1, 2011 A woman looks better in a g-string. not always... PLEASE don't post a pic to prove your point. I'll conceed. Agreed! ok, but if you begin to doubt, google "people of walmart"....[] Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
oscarsear Posted June 1, 2011 Author Share Posted June 1, 2011 My word this thread got's some legs (no pun intended). I have changed my mind. I have decided to add houseplants to the things I like better than most women. They are more predictable and with a little fertilizer and water they thrive. Now it is not that I do not like women in all respects, mind you. In some respects they are quite irreplaceable. And I'd submit that even if you feel that you've got that one right person, it can change in a heartbeat and for reasons that make no sense whatsoever. Be careful. Be afraid. Be wary. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BigStewMan Posted June 1, 2011 Share Posted June 1, 2011 Now it is not that I do not like women in all respects, mind you. In some respects they are quite irreplaceable. And I'd submit that even if you feel that you've got that one right person, it can change in a heartbeat and for reasons that make no sense whatsoever. Be careful. Be afraid. Be wary. but you usually have a blast before you get burnt. i'm gonna hope that i'm careful BEFORE i select a woman that i want to get involved with because once i do, i refuse to be careful or wary--i don't ever want to have to protect myself from the woman i love. Furthermore, i will not make her sign a pre-nup either, and I have 12 Klipsch speakers at stake. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
oscarsear Posted June 1, 2011 Author Share Posted June 1, 2011 Now it is not that I do not like women in all respects, mind you. In some respects they are quite irreplaceable. And I'd submit that even if you feel that you've got that one right person, it can change in a heartbeat and for reasons that make no sense whatsoever. Be careful. Be afraid. Be wary. but you usually have a blast before you get burnt. i'm gonna hope that i'm careful BEFORE i select a woman that i want to get involved with because once i do, i refuse to be careful or wary--i don't ever want to have to protect myself from the woman i love. Furthermore, i will not make her sign a pre-nup either, and I have 12 Klipsch speakers at stake. In my experience..... Get the pre... nup! I learned the hard way. Benefit from my experience. My brother tried to tell me. My oldest son tried to tell me. But I was a smart person.... and I learned just how stupid i was. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fotog Posted June 2, 2011 Share Posted June 2, 2011 No matter how good a woman looks - [Y] There is a guy out there somewhere who is tired of putting up with her sh!t [^o)] Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gnatnoop Posted June 2, 2011 Share Posted June 2, 2011 know why women don't fart as much as men? they don't shut their mouth long enough to build up the required pressure! [] Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marvel Posted June 2, 2011 Share Posted June 2, 2011 i'm gonna hope that i'm careful BEFORE i select a woman that i want to get involved with because once i do, i refuse to be careful or wary--i don't ever want to have to protect myself from the woman i love. Furthermore, i will not make her sign a pre-nup either, and I have 12 Klipsch speakers at stake. I absolutley love this... If you can't give yourself totally to someone, you're are asking for failure.It has to be a total surrender. You must open yourself up to the possibility of failure. That's what love is all about. If I don'r give myself totally, then love is not there.my 2 cents...Bruce Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BigStewMan Posted June 3, 2011 Share Posted June 3, 2011 that's why you're a wise (and happy) man bruce--and i agree with you 100% Steve. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
oscarsear Posted June 3, 2011 Author Share Posted June 3, 2011 i'm gonna hope that i'm careful BEFORE i select a woman that i want to get involved with because once i do, i refuse to be careful or wary--i don't ever want to have to protect myself from the woman i love. Furthermore, i will not make her sign a pre-nup either, and I have 12 Klipsch speakers at stake. I absolutley love this... If you can't give yourself totally to someone, you're are asking for failure.It has to be a total surrender. You must open yourself up to the possibility of failure. That's what love is all about. If I don'r give myself totally, then love is not there.my 2 cents...Bruce Bruce..... Well I did not write the quotation you cited. Don't know who did. I do recall reading it. But it were not myself. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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