72 year old Yitzhak has just entered his shul and sat down when he sees Hymie, an old friend of his, sitting on the other side of the shul, with a young blonde woman at his side. At the end of the service, as he is leaving, Yitzhak sees Hymie walking away arm in arm with this woman. So he discreetly follows them into the local park and from a distance, watches them cavort around just like youngsters. When they finish locked in each other’s arms, Yitzhak thinks, "Oy, did they enjoy themselves!"
Next shabbat, Yitzhak enters his shul, sits down, and again sees Hymie, but this time with a different young woman at his side. And then, later on during the service, Hymie gets the Hagbah aliyah, and is soon holding the Torah above his head and spinning around as if he were 20 years old.
So at the end of the service, Yitzhak goes over to Hymie, congratulates him, and asks, "So what's going on with you Hymie? Are you on drugs or what?"
Hymie replies, "I don't want to talk about it here. Come with me into the Mens Room and I'll explain."
When they get there, Hymie says, "I've recently had a shmeckle transplant, donated by the family of a young man killed in a car accident."
When Hymie then shows Yitzhak his 8" strong looking shmeckle, Yitzhak says, "Oy vey, that’s fantastic," and then takes the name of the surgeon who had performed the transplant.
Within days, Yitzhak has made an appointment to see the surgeon privately. After hearing the details, Yitzhak asks, "So could I have the same operation?"
The surgeon replies, "No problem."
Yitzhak asks him, "So how much will such an operation cost me?"
"If it's the same as your friend Hymie had, it will cost you $10,000," replies the surgeon.
Yitzhak says, "Oy doctor, that's too much. I'm not as rich as Hymie."
The surgeon says, "That's OK, I have a number of penises available from $100 upwards. You choose."
Yitzhak chooses the cheapest one for $100.
Hymie and Yitzhak meet up in shul a few weeks later. Yitzhak shuffles in and Hymie goes over to him, slaps him on the back and quietly says, "So nu? How did the Operation go?"
Yitzhak replies, "It went OK, but I don’t really feel any different."
So Hymie says, "let’s go to the Men’s Room so that I can have a peep."
When Yitzhak takes it out, Hymie gives a bellow of laughter and says, "He gave you my old one!"