mike stehr Posted June 18, 2004 Share Posted June 18, 2004 Lick me where I pee.......... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wrench_peddler Posted June 18, 2004 Share Posted June 18, 2004 On the Tonight show with Johnny Carson, Jerry Lawler(pro wrestler) said to andy Kaufman ( Lotka from "taxi",actor,wrestler,showman) "your momma wanted a girl, your daddy wanted a boy, when you were born, they were both happy." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Piranha Posted June 18, 2004 Share Posted June 18, 2004 ---------------- On 6/18/2004 12:33:38 PM Ray Garrison wrote: I think, no, no I am certain that you are the most unattractive man I have met in my entire life. In the short time that I have known you, you have demonstrated all of the loathsome characteristics of the male personality, AND even discovered a few new ones. You are physically repulsive, morally reprehensible, selfish, stupid, you have no taste, a lousy sense of humor, and you smell. You know, you're not even interesting enough to make me sick. ---------------- Sounds eerily similar to what my wife said to me after my last gear purchase. I wonder if she was serious?? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
radiob Posted June 18, 2004 Share Posted June 18, 2004 BADUNKADUNK!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dodger Posted June 18, 2004 Share Posted June 18, 2004 Hello Again: This one usually for referees at hockey games: When you get home I hope your Mother comes out from behind the couch and bites you. Finally: Cross eyed Cyclops. Please note that is not meant to be cruel to anyone that is truly cross eyed. No offense to them. dodger Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lurch Posted June 18, 2004 Share Posted June 18, 2004 My wife was in a bar (back in her collegiate days) and sitting with a friend. Some jerk was bantering back and forth with them and decided to show off his manhood to startle them. It didn't work. My wife said, "Does that come in adult sizes?" Needless to say, that was the end of the discussion! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skonopa Posted June 18, 2004 Share Posted June 18, 2004 ---------------- On 6/18/2004 5:08:12 PM dodger wrote: This one usually for referees at hockey games: When you get home I hope your Mother comes out from behind the couch and bites you. ---------------- Speaking of hockey referees! I heard this interesting little diddy at a hockey game I was at a couple years ago: "A stick! A puck! The referee sucks! A puck! A stick! The refeeree's a ****!" That whole section we were in just busted out howling! It was classic! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ray Garrison Posted June 18, 2004 Share Posted June 18, 2004 Drunkenness is his best virtue, for he will be swine drunk, and in his sleep he does little harm, save to his bedclothes about him. Boils and plagues plaster you over, that you may be abhorred farther than seen and one infect another against the wind a mile. You souls of geese that bear the shapes of men. What a disgrace it is to me that I should remember your name. On my knee I give heaven thanks that I am not like to thee. Thou art a boil, a plague sore, an embossed carbuncle in my corrupted blood. and my favorite, All that is within him does condemn itself for being there. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Colin Posted June 18, 2004 Author Share Posted June 18, 2004 awh, professor, you crack me up. a shame we never met: insults become you! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Colin Posted June 18, 2004 Author Share Posted June 18, 2004 Girlfriend of mine with incredible features above the waist was flashed on a Minneapolis bus, she said: That looks likes a penis, only smaller (Jane Larson is now a feminist law professor in Wisconsin, right Paranha?) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
reel 2 reel Posted June 18, 2004 Share Posted June 18, 2004 ---------------- On 6/18/2004 12:33:38 PM Ray Garrison wrote: I think, no, no I am certain that you are the most unattractive man I have met in my entire life. In the short time that I have known you, you have demonstrated all of the loathsome characteristics of the male personality, AND even discovered a few new ones. You are physically repulsive, morally reprehensible, selfish, stupid, you have no taste, a lousy sense of humor, and you smell. You know, you're not even interesting enough to make me sick. ---------------- It's a good thing I have money ....HUH!!!!!! I like that one!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ray Garrison Posted June 18, 2004 Share Posted June 18, 2004 Professor? *PROFESSOR* Just sit right back and you'll hear a tale, a tale of a fateful trip... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WMcD Posted June 18, 2004 Share Posted June 18, 2004 Except for the vulgarity this ain't half bad. Sort of a "legal" flame war. What J-M says about Chicago is not true, except in Tom B.'s neighborhood. Gil Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lynnm Posted June 18, 2004 Share Posted June 18, 2004 ca. 1850 Lord Chesterfield ( having been offended by something said by Lord Wilkes in the House of Lords ) By God Sir !! You will die by the Noose or the Pox ! Wilkes That Milord depends upon which I embrace...........Your Morals or your mistress! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
soundsol Posted June 19, 2004 Share Posted June 19, 2004 I have decided that Olorin wins the both the best insult award AND the chauvinist pig of the year award! Still laughing here.....maybe I'm a chauvinist too! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jt1stcav Posted June 19, 2004 Share Posted June 19, 2004 When I worked at Liberty Square at Walt Disney World's Magic Kingdom theme park, I had to wear the appropriate attire that best resembled 1776 Colonial America (a white semi-long sleeve shirt with ruffled collar, a long brown vest, brown knee-length knickers with white knee-high stretch socks, and a pair of slip-on black dress shoes with big brass buckles on top). Thank goodness I didn't have to wear a white powdered wig and a tri-cornered hat, or I would've quit the very first day (I ended up staying there for 17 years)! One day a bunch of teens walked past my silhouette cart (where I created silhouette portraits cut out from black paper for the guests), and one snot-nosed punk, trying to impress his girlfriend, shouted out to me, "Hey man, love those knickers and white socks. You look so cool, dude!", followed by much laughter and finger-pointing. My response was, "At least I get paid really good money to look this stupid...so, what's your excuse?" Guess you just had to be there... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
picky Posted June 19, 2004 Share Posted June 19, 2004 May the fleas of a thousand camels infest your balls! **Yeouch!** Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ZAKO Posted June 19, 2004 Share Posted June 19, 2004 You sir have a 5 pound skull packed with 10 pounds of sh!t. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mighty Favog Posted June 19, 2004 Share Posted June 19, 2004 He/she smells like a bus. or On the "Bob & Tom Show" one morning on the radio the subject was "The Most disgusting thing you've ever done"... Host: "Hello? Bob and Tom Show" Caller: "Hello, Bob and Tom??" Host: "Yes" Caller: "Hello! This is Tom Arnold....." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mighty Favog Posted June 19, 2004 Share Posted June 19, 2004 You Lawyer!! or Your soul is an apalling dump heap overflowing with the most disgraceful assortment of deplorable rubbish imaginable, Mangled up in tangled up knots. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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