clermontcop Posted January 2, 2010 Share Posted January 2, 2010 Have you ever done something for someone, or went the extra mile and deep down you have that same expectation of that person only to realize that you have only let yourself down. I suppose what it is im trying to say is this, im a very good natured man and I bend over backwards 99% of the time for whatever it is I may be doing. I have done alot of deals here on the forum, by mail and alot in person, and have literally either taken a loss or have given more then I had to, only to find that most of the time I walk away after the deal saying to myself gee Matt your a schmuck, and realize that I let myself down once again due to this word called "expectation" that I expect to receive back. I realize I have no one to blame but myself, how do you change being a good natured person when its part of you and that is what has been instilled within you. I want to say that out off all the forum members I have dealt with only one stands out and has exceeded my expectation, imagine that, and that's kevfromflint, freaken awesome guy, TRUE to his word, thanks Kevin for everything. HVN good person, this man stepped up to the plate, did not know me at all, good hearted, thanks Noah. 2009 has been a horrific year for me, everything from my mother passing away, losing two of my partners, motorcycle cops are a different breed of people. Being screwed over by people that I thought were my friends and some of them really taking me by suprise. Dealing with a bout of prostate cancer. Im glad 2009 is over. As for me, I probably will continue walking away after making deals saying the same thing, gee Matt your a schmuck. Its okay, there are not to many good natured people in this world, I suppose somebody has to keep it going. I truely hope 2010 turns out to be a better year not only for myself but for everyone hear within the forum. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Groomlakearea51 Posted January 2, 2010 Share Posted January 2, 2010 Rough year Matt, rough year. But it will get better. Just keep the faith and all things will fall into their proper place and time [Y] Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr. RF62 Posted January 2, 2010 Share Posted January 2, 2010 Yeah Matt, you right! There aren't THAT many good natured people anymore, or so it seems. You being a cop (I assume), by the sounds of it, you would be fair in your assesments for reasons of pulling someone over for traffic violations or something of a greater matter. I have run into more than my fair share of people (not cops in general) that are very sellfish and ignorant. A person really does have to figure a person out first to know what it'll be like. Especially if you don't have a good judgement. Sorry to hear of the negative things in your life, but for the positives and the stuff you learn from these happenings, makes you a smarter, more experinced, stronger person than you used to be. Even though people are like that, your good naturedness will be passed on through someone who like yourself, is good natured, and maybe that person will continue it on as well. Have a good 2010! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
oscarsear Posted January 2, 2010 Share Posted January 2, 2010 I think the old saying holds true, 'good guys finish last'. Their openness makes them easy and vulnerable targets. But, being a well mannered, helper is also a reward in itself. You reap the peace of mind knowing that you are honest with yourself and those who might abuse your friendship will never have that accomplishment. There is no shortage of jerks in this world. Not being one is no reason to allow them to ruin your days. My license plate reads "DODADAY" my-oh-my what a wonderful day. You bring your own sunshine everywhere you go. Enjoy it. Relish it. Bask in it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MechMan Posted January 2, 2010 Share Posted January 2, 2010 I don't know Matt... It sounds to me like the world could use a few more people like you. I hope twenty-ten brings you closer to peace. Rick Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BigStewMan Posted January 2, 2010 Share Posted January 2, 2010 Matt--I sympathize with you; because, I'm right there with you. But, reread your post. You're asking how can you change from being a good guy--why would you want to? I respectfully disagree with (a portion) of Oscarsear's post--it seems like nice guy's finish last because most people are using the wrong standard to evaluate themselves and/or others. You've probably heard the saying, "when in doubt--lower the standard." Too many people do that. You don't want to be like them. Eventually, you're going to have a peace about the way you've lived that they won't have--and that's going to be more comforting than all the "good deals" that they managed to get. If you're willing to take a loss on an item--that's cool; but, do it WITHOUT expecting to make it up on the next deal--that kinda takes the coolness out of who you are in the first place. I don't think I've ever sold something for more than I paid for it. I just look at the "percieved" loss and figure that I rented that stuff for several years and then i tell myself that the few dollars that i'm losing was worth it because I got many hours of enjoyment out it. You sound like a stand-up dude--that's cool and not something that you should be looking to change. I had a similar 2009 as you. Lost my Mom, got divorced in which i lost my house, got ran over by a truck while walking across the street and now have a never ending list of physical aches & pains (notwithstanding the fact that the irresponsible driver was grossly underinsured--not enough to cover a fraction of the medical bills). I was glad to see 2009 end. But, we'll be alright in the long wrong, my friend. Regards, Steve Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
T2K Posted January 2, 2010 Share Posted January 2, 2010 Your expectation of others is too high. The solution is simple, expect little of others and you won't be disappointed. People are generally selfish these days and there is nothing you or anyone else can do about it except to revel in the fact that they have to live with their collective selves. Donate what you don't need to an organization that helps those less fortunate. People that have nothing to eat are usually more thankful for your help than those that are just collecting speakers,etc. Every year that goes by I am more thankful for the opportunities that seem to come my way. When times are bad something good seems to happen. I personally expect nothing but hard work, but Someone seems to help me along the way and I am thankful for that and recognize it. I hope that the new year brings you some luck and comfort for the losses that you have experienced. Keith Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kevinmi Posted January 2, 2010 Share Posted January 2, 2010 I still believe in treating people the way you would want to be treated. Unfortunately, there are far too many people who would rather take advantage of and think of only themselves. It can get discouraging, but I have to believe in the saying that "what goes around comes around"! Someday your good deeds will be rewarded. I've been truly blessed in dealing with the people on this forum. I've met some great people and got a boatload of great advice and useful information. I don't always agree with everyone's opinion, but then again, that's what makes us individuals. Matt (Clermontcop) is a straight shooter, and I've had some good conversations with him (ran my battery dead on the phone once!), and we've had some good transactions between us. I understand his frustrations, and can only hope he doesn't get hardened by the bad things in life, but rather keep his hopes up that there is still a world of good out there. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marvel Posted January 2, 2010 Share Posted January 2, 2010 You have to expect the best from people, and this forum has some truly great people participating. I never cease to be amazed at the generosity and help provided by the folks here. That being said, I had one not so pleasant transaction with someone here, although it turned out ok in the end. And I promised to send someone a pair of tubes, but I lost who it was, so I haven't been able to follow up on it. My bad, and I am kicking myself for it. This place is really no different than a relationship with a spouse, in that to love means you make yourself vulnerable. We also make ourselves vulnerable when we offer help, products, etc. Some will just take advantage, but others help by passing on the same service and help or returning it to you. Bruce Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JL Sargent Posted January 2, 2010 Share Posted January 2, 2010 Matt, I think you are right to expect the best of people. Most people are good, honest, and dependable. I really believe that. Until I am proven wrong, I think others will do right by me. Most of the time I'm rewarded with just that. I refuse to loose faith in people. I hope you don't either. Best wishes for a great 2010. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jacksonbart Posted January 2, 2010 Share Posted January 2, 2010 Its nice to be nice to the nice Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators dtel Posted January 2, 2010 Moderators Share Posted January 2, 2010 As for me, I probably will continue walking away after making deals saying the same thing, gee Matt your a schmuck. Its okay, there are not to many good natured people in this world, I suppose somebody has to keep it going. Your right, keep it going there are many good people here on the forum. One I know lives down by you, Marshal he has been here more than once and has done things that have shocked me ( in a good way ). I have met quite a few people here who are good natured and go out of there way to help. Like any place there are some who only look out for themselves but more of the good natured ones so keep it going at least your on the right side that way. [Y] Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
clermontcop Posted January 2, 2010 Author Share Posted January 2, 2010 You are correct, Marshall is a great guy. He took me under his wing and showed me the trade of veneering. Though I am not as good as he is, I hope to be someday. Sorry about that Marshall that I did not put you in my first post. Hats off to Marshall.[Y][Y][Y][Y] Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
clermontcop Posted January 3, 2010 Author Share Posted January 3, 2010 I want to thank everyone who has taken the time to read this post. All of the posts were very inspiring. I realize that I cannot cry over spilled milk, I will learn from the mistakes I have made in the past and move on. 2010 will be a good year not only for myself but for everyone here on the forum also. Thank you to all my forum friends. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Groomlakearea51 Posted January 3, 2010 Share Posted January 3, 2010 You are correct, Marshall is a great guy. He took me under his wing and showed me the trade of veneering. Though I am not as good as he is, I hope to be someday. Sorry about that Marshall that I did not put you in my first post. Hats off to Marshall. The guilt!!! The tragic consequences of living a life that mirrors the substance and philosophy of the Greek heros!!! You have finally come to your senses!!! But, don't think I will absolve you with a wave of my hand (and a pot of veneer glue and some esoteric stain...) My feelings are hurt!!! That minor oversight has plunged me into a total fit of abject despair and a demented, psychologically flawed examination of self worth from which my esteem-o-meter was broken. The glaring omission has further forced me to consider abusing small animals (the cats... inasmuch as they generally deserve it...) But, then again, I have always been in the un-enviable psycho status of those shallow, pitiful creatures who spend their insignificant (but sometimes useful...) lives looking for a surrogate father figure on which to vent the insane ravings .... And you have triggered it!!! How could you!!! The tears.... the drama!!! Ok!, I'm ok now.... But it will cost you three cases of Sam Adams on the next trip!!!! Heh, Heh!!! [H] Boston Lager is the preferred "bribe du jour"...... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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