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Best Man--the obvious choice


BigStewMan

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​In probably not the wisest decision that he’s ever made, a friend calls me this morning from Indiana…asks me to be the best man at his wedding (he’s actually been married 10 years already).  He and his wife were married at the Justice of the Peace or County Clerk (whatever it’s called) and he told her that on the 10th anniversary they’d go back to her home in the Phillipines and have a big Church wedding with all her family there. 

​I’m thinking, “am i going to Skype in or what?”  B)  But he wants me there for real, so looks like next February, i’ll be heading to the Phillipines.

I’ve never been there, so it does sound exciting.  I hope this will be a low heat/humidity time of year there--I have Asthma concerns.

Edited by BigStewMan
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Devil's Advocate:  I'm sure you answered immediately in the heat of the moment, but the guy is asking YOU to go to the Philippines.    :blink:   I'm sure its great for her to go back "home" but not so convenient for anybody else, not to mention expensive.  And for what?

 

I would think it over, and don't be a people pleaser, if it isn't good for you health-wise or financially, don't be afraid to call him back and tell him its not going to work out for you.

+++

 

I'm not trying to talk you in or out of anything.  I'm just being the voice of reason.  B)

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He told me i can say no without hurting his feelings and offered to help pay the airfare.  He already owns a house there, so i won’t have any lodging expense either. He just asked me to “think about it.”  Which i said i would consider it … if it sounds like a time of year that my lungs won’t be mad at me--I’m up for an adventure.  Plus, he said his house is 300 yards from the local hospital.

​Thank you for the voice of reason though--i need to hear that as i’m impulsive; but, also fearful. Which i guess means I often do what i shouldn’t and let fear/concerns keep me from doing some things that i probably should be doing.

​It’s not easy being me.

Edited by BigStewMan
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Might want to see a picture of the hospital.  Might be a grass hut with the local witch doctor. 

 

Honestly, I would have thought he would have paid for your ticket 100% if he's asking you to be the best man.

 

I don't know how that works though.  I used my dad so he was already attending.

 

It is a long journey to get there.  It might be more difficult to get there than to actually be there.

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Any idea exactly where in the PI you would be going?  It's a big place....

i think the closest decent sized place is ilo ilo city.  he said his house is about 10 miles from the ocean. The town his house is in is pretty rural apparently, i believe the name of the place was Alimodian.  Sounds like his house is pretty modern--and with air conditioning.

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A beautiful country and wonderful folks. Believe it or not, way up here in Yellowknife they are the single largest ethnic community. Very family oriented and hard working people.

It is hot there and depending on where you are humid- but some places are bathed in a constant ocean breeze that is very doable. A lot of places do have air con.

Ask him about his place and the venue. he must think very highly of you to ask you to be part of something that means this much to him, at the very least check out the logistics.

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he must think very highly of you to ask you to be part of something that means this much to him, at the very least check out the logistics.

 

It is quite the honor and true friendship. :)

 

 

Maybe he just wants a designated driver that he can trust?  :blink:

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I've been there twice. The first time was a culture shock that is almost hard to explain........but I had such a great experience......and a great time. I don't think it's something you'll ever forget.

 

I went there both times in late January from the WI cold to 90 degree humid weather....which was actually pretty inviting. It was coming back home to the ice cold Chicago O'Hare airport that had me instantly thinking "Why would anyone want to live here in this cold?" LOL...

 

Drank a lot of beer (Red Horse) in the barrio.....third world country in every way. Then, drank a lot of beer on an island with white sand and turquoise waters......like paradise. Very cool. Something I'll never forget.

 

 

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You should certainly do this. I've been best man three times and consider it a great honor. You should too.

Let me wade into a touchy subject though. If this is to be in a Catholic church they might ask if you're Catholic. I certainly don't know the specifics on this. The couple might be able to scope this out and get whatever variances, if any, are needed.

Yeah, I know it is not like the old days where all Spanish speaking countries were solid Catholic. It may well be that the church is a Christian denomination, or Jewish, or Muslim, or Hindu. The world has changed. Smile.

Again. Do it. You'll have a very good time and your buddy and his bride will be happy to have you.

WMcD

Edited by William F. Gil McDermott
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