The History Kid Posted April 5, 2015 Share Posted April 5, 2015 So, some of you might be wondering where I've been - I count this forum as a second family really, so I appreciate that concern. In August of last year, my mother who has worked for the local school district for many years left that job. We've been fighting with the disability office now for a good 7-8 months now after they denied her claim (she has fibromyalgia). In addition to that, I was kind of screwed out of going back to school due to my financial institution pulling a fast one over me to revoke my student financial aid. Recently, they decided to call those loans in. If that wasn't enough, the only income this house is seeing is the $250 every other week that I bring home. The rest has been coming from other family members outside of the home, although if headway isn't made soon there, that'll run out. So I've been picking up many extra hours. Of course all the stress at home, and nicer weather, I've tried my best to stay outdoors and either do projects that take my mind off things, or jog/walk/hike. So the really nice days I'm not home usually until late. Now, I also just found out that 1 of my former 3 roommates from last year pulled another fast one on me that might cost my returning to St. Louis this year again. With the health issues in the family, overclocked work, and the like I hadn't had time to get in touch and fill out forms for an apartment (let alone the fact they'd only give me a few days notice when things needed to be done). Today I got chewed out by the guys girlfriend because I extended an option to the other two roommates (one of which was originally going to just room with me) that I pay off their deposit and find another place. Apparently that made me a horrible ***. Yesterday I was informed I was "out." As a student who is re-entering school at 25...I'm not eligible to live on campus. So that likely means I won't be going back there - I'll probably be going to Iowa this coming year, and finishing there. What keeps sucking so bad is just when I think I've gotten one thing figured out and addressed, something else pops up. Not feeling very hoppy this Easter... :\ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ceptorman Posted April 5, 2015 Share Posted April 5, 2015 I'm sorry to hear this Michael, current tough times for sure. You seem like a bright, good natured guy, and I'm sure you'll figure out the best option for you. The main thing to consider is to keep your Mom feeling well, she sounds like she needs you right now. You seem like a positive person, and good things usually happen to good people. So hang in there, I'll bet your situation will improve……Bill 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JiminSTL Posted April 5, 2015 Share Posted April 5, 2015 Michael, Bill (^) said it briefly, and well. And, indeed, trials are never fun or easy, and we want them over as quickly as possible. Simply . . . GO AWAY! But, while God does not promise life without trials and pain (in fact promises trials and pain), He also promises to use them for the long-term good of others and you--if you will trust, and let Him. I will pray for you and your circumstances; I also am thinking about an idea that may be helpful. Jim 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The History Kid Posted April 5, 2015 Author Share Posted April 5, 2015 Thanks for the words guys. I am positive the good Lord has a reason for all of this. It's just really hard to keep ones spirits up when you're kicked and stepped on when you're already down. I'm hopeful of either campus coming through with something, or that I find out of some really good options in Iowa. The only thing I'm just not totally optimistic about with the former is that...I've never really been a partier, I tend to not be that interested in the sort, and even now at 25, I just want my degree so I can get to work with what I want to do. The bad part about living on campus is most of those students don't care about that stuff as much as I do. It can make an environment with new roommates very difficult - not being fair to any party. The world still turns though, and I live to breathe another day. I'm thankful for that, for sure. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
minermark Posted April 5, 2015 Share Posted April 5, 2015 Bummer Dude Let me throw a couple thoughts your way. but i will do it in a PM. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mallette Posted April 5, 2015 Share Posted April 5, 2015 (edited) Tough one, young sir! Try some lateral thinking. Some of those issues can be simply walked away from. Others need to be confronted head on. Of course, taking care of the one who cared for you is NUMBER ONE. The rest you have time to deal with at your age. Forget about yourself right now and do what you can for your mom. Many of us believe that such sacrifice yields good things. Even if you believe in nothing but life is brutish and short, your self image and that of those who observe your actions will yield good things for you compared to just railing about the injustice of fate. This IS your second family...and we are here for you! Dave Edited April 5, 2015 by Mallette 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mxr dad Posted April 5, 2015 Share Posted April 5, 2015 Keep your chin up Dude. Karma is real and what comes around goes around. Keep that in mind thru your daily tasks and thoughts and you will be a better man for it. If you do good; good will come to you. Those that go around cheating people might seem to win the short term battle, but they never win the war. That old saying about peaks and valleys is true as well. You have to go thru the valleys before you reach the peaks. It wont be the last time your tested, and its how you react to these situations that define who you really are. Happy Easter buddy. I enjoy your company on this Forum and hope all "gets fixed" soon. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The History Kid Posted April 5, 2015 Author Share Posted April 5, 2015 You guys are the best. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
garyrc Posted April 5, 2015 Share Posted April 5, 2015 As a student who is re-entering school at 25...I'm not eligible to live on campus Age discrimination! Does the campus have a consulting lawyer for students to use? At SFSU we had one who would meet with students and advise them free of charge, but he was terrifically overbooked, and just advised & wrote the occasional letter, but did not represent them in legal actions, as I remember. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mallette Posted April 5, 2015 Share Posted April 5, 2015 Age discrimination! Didn't occur to me when I saw it, but you are damsure right! No different that making gays live apart or whatever. If, at 65, I want to move into a dorm and pay the price what the hell business is it of a tax supported institution to say "Your are too old" or "You represent a risk." SERIOUSLY? CHARGE!!! We old hippies don't like that kind of thing one dam bit! Dave 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The History Kid Posted April 5, 2015 Author Share Posted April 5, 2015 Would that apply as well to a private university that has you sign that very same policy of acknowledgement and acceptance on enrollment? Regardless, they could opt to shove me in a room of 3 party-bangers. That wouldn't very well help my situation at all, in fact it could make it worse. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mxr dad Posted April 6, 2015 Share Posted April 6, 2015 Yeah, this may be one of those........ pick your battles. At the very least, I see it consuming a lot of your time and no guarantee on outcome. One door closes another opens right? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BigStewMan Posted April 6, 2015 Share Posted April 6, 2015 Perseverence Brother … Keep the faith and one day you’ll look back on this and be grateful it happened this way. Kinda like this gal i was sweet on once--all i wanted at the time, now i’m SOOOOO grateful that relationship ended. Tough when you’re going through it; but, if you decide to do right and persevere through these tough times…you’ll be better off for it. Plus, sounds like you’ve got a blank canvas now to paint the next chapter of your life -- that’s exciting. Steve Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CECAA850 Posted April 6, 2015 Share Posted April 6, 2015 What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. It's hard to remind yourself of that when you're going through the trials that life can bring you though. Keep a positive attitude and take care of your mom. The rest will be handled in it's own time. I wish you luck and sent prayers your way. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eth2 Posted April 6, 2015 Share Posted April 6, 2015 Isn't there grad school housing at St. Louis? I went back to Law School when I was way over 25 and lived in Graduate housing with my wife and 4 year old. There were undergrads there who were "older" as well. At 25 I believe you are an "emancipated" student, meaning it is only your income (and not a parents income or assets) which are used for financial aid. Maybe this is not a help, but most financial aid offices take into account extraordinary events. I believe that there are deferrals for such circumstances for federal loans. Maybe St. Louis isn't the right place. Only you know that. I went back to undergrad school at 24 so I know it isn't easy, and you can feel out of place. I did. However, it was more than worth it. I respect you for helping your mother. It is a sign of true character and will serve you well during your life. With respect to your mother's disability claims, I of course do not know the details and am not asking. However, if she is permanently and totally disabled, she is entitled to social security disability benefits. It is VERY common to be denied at the first step. You may want to see a lawyer. They cannot charge you unless they win the case, and I believe that their fee is capped at about $7,000 paid from the proceeds of the claim (I think this is right). Be careful because this is an area of the law where attorneys survive on volume. Interview a few and ask if any former clients would agree to speak with you. There are also non-attorney representatives who are allowed to practice in this area. They are usually ex-Social Security Administration reps. I am an employment attorney, but this is not an area in which I practice, nor do I know any employment attorneys who do practice in this area. I have represented two friends before SS. who had severe disabilities so I have some understanding of the law in this area. I would be happy to answer questions to the extent that I can and help you think through this. I will pm you my cell number. Earl 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Karsoncookie Posted April 6, 2015 Share Posted April 6, 2015 Ibiza - When you say "disability office" do you mean like a teacher union one, or the SSA?? Lars Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
USNRET Posted April 6, 2015 Share Posted April 6, 2015 Hang in there shipmate, we are here for you! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
finallygotmyheresies Posted April 6, 2015 Share Posted April 6, 2015 you arent too old to join the guard or even active duty military. I like to remind people of that option Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Dude Posted April 6, 2015 Share Posted April 6, 2015 Keep your head up, as I have not been in your situation I do have empathy for you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The History Kid Posted April 6, 2015 Author Share Posted April 6, 2015 Yeah, she's currently got a lawyer taking care of that issue. It's just the long process between point B and C really right now. I'm optimistic, it's just one of those cases where it all comes down at once. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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