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Marvel

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An elderly man owned a large farm for several years and he had a large pond on the far end of his property. It was properly shaped for swimming, so he fixed it up nicely with picnic tables, horseshoe courts, and some apple and peach trees. One evening the old farmer decided to go down to the pond since he hadn't been there for a while. He grabbed a big white bucket to bring back some fruit before starting the long walk to the remote area. As he neared the pond, he heard voices shouting and laughing with glee. As he came closer, he saw it was several young women skinny-dipping in his pond. He made the women aware of his presence, and they all went to the deep end. One of the women shouted to him, "We're not coming out until you leave!"The old man frowned. "I didn't come down here to watch you ladies swim naked or make you get out of the pond naked."Holding the bucket up, he said, "I'm here to feed the crocodile."Some old men can still think fast.

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On 4/27/2024 at 1:49 AM, Dave1291 said:

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I can't figure out how the Beatles "Blackbird" got on there. It's excellent, but I wouldn't consider it a country song.

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13 minutes ago, Marvel said:

I can't figure out how the Beatles "Blackbird" got on there. It's excellent, but I wouldn't consider it a country song.

An album by a black woman singing a song about black women.

 

 

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33 minutes ago, Invidiosulus said:

An album by a black woman singing a song about black women.

 

I understand that, as well as McCartney's story about the meaning of the song. I think it's great, but like a lot of other music from that genre, it's simply great music.

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  • 2 weeks later...
Chaim comes to his rabbi with a problem he’s been having lately:
— Rabbi, as you know, I’ve been working at Katz’ Deli for the past few years. But lately, I’ve been overcome with an immense desire to stick my penis into the pickle slicer. All I can think about is fulfilling this dream of mine.
The rabbi is disturbed and suggests to Chaim to join Talmudic studies at the synagogue a few times a week to see if the wisdom of Talmud may help him overcome such a peculiar desire.
After a few weeks, Chaim comes to rabbi again. He clearly lost a few pounds, his forehead is sweaty, and he shares with rabbi that even though the study helped to dull his obsession a little initially, but it came back with a vengeance and the only thing he really can think of is sticking his penis into the pickle slicer at work.
Rabbi thinks hard about it and finally says: Chaim, since the desire in you is so powerful and it consumes you so much, then perhaps the best course of action would be to follow up on it.
So Chaim leaves, and comes back next afternoon proclaiming:
— Rabbi, Rabbi! I did it! I stuck my penis into the pickle slicer!
Rabbi looks at him in disbelief and asks him:
— Are you OK, Chaim?
— Yes, yes, I am more than OK! It was the best experience in my life! I did get fired from Katz’ Deli, but it was absolutely worth it!
— And what about the pickle slicer?
— Well, she got fired too.
 
 
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