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Dave A

Refusal to talk

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I don't mind calling if I have several topics to discuss. If it's just a quick question or status update then I text. When I'm at work I often just text because or privacy it's not like I have top secret conversations but the conversations I do have I would rather keep between me and the person(s) I'm communicating with.

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1 hour ago, DizRotus said:

It appears to be a generational thing.  We find the same thing in our small business. Rather than spend a few seconds on the phone to schedule a mutually convenient appointment, many younger people would rather exchange many texts and/or emails with possible appointment days and times.  It’s maddening, but seems to be how business is conducted these days.

Though I haven't done it, I think you can set up and share a Google (or other) calendar and make it public.  You can put your appointments on it, and they will appear as "unavailable" to members of the public.  Then, you let them pick a time on your calendar when you are available.  Then, the new appointment is made, and your calendar is up to date - all by your customer and not you.  

 

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1 hour ago, DizRotus said:

I never got a mynah bird.

I bet you got a mayjah bird, didn't you?  

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No cell phone, no texting so it's a land line or email.  You guys sound too busy/nervous to chat anyway😉

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No problem talking, but I'm like Tarheel no cell phone or landline but I do look at my email regularly, like once or twice a month maby. Wish I could talk but sorry, not really. :o

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some have a form of social anxiety where they have difficulty communicating "on the spot," and prefer to email where they don't have the pressure of keeping up with someone that has the gift of gab. When forced to speak in real time, they'll often forgot half of what they want to ask or do such a lousy job expressing themselves that you aren't able to address their questions completely. 

Some, like me, have a hearing disability. In 2012, my hearing was tested and I wasn't able to hear below 70db. I'm better with hearing aids; but putting a phone to my ear is a nightmare -- feedback and then the voice sounds weak & distant. for an important phone call, I used to go out to my car where I could listen through the car speakers. If I'm in a situation that allows, I can use the speaker phone function; but I've been on speaker phone before and been asked by the other person to "take me off speakerphone."

then there are some that just aren't an enjoyable conversation -- you ask a question and get a rude reply or a lecture. This happens even in emails -- you ask a question and the person provides a long explanation that doesn't even address your question. When you repeat the question, they sometimes get upset as if you're either not paying attention or just wasting their time. 

Communication is difficult for many. 

I'm dreading a medical phone appointment next week. I've been told the doctor is from the Philippines and I worry that, with my already bad hearing, that I'll have trouble understanding her. Then the embarrassment sets in. I've been asked questions and it's very embarrassing to have to reply that "I didn't hear everything you said."  You'd be surprised at how many people, even when they know you have a hearing disability, still get upset when they have to repeat themselves. As if I'm going deaf by choice -- just to upset them. 

I often don't hear a knock on my door. I've had people ask me "is that your cell phone ringing?" when the phone is in my pocket and is ringing. Following a conversation is hard enough, particularly when you're in a crowd. I've sat in meetings at work and had the boss say (in a not nice manner) "You better turn those hearing aids up!"  

May as well yell at the crippled person for being in the way on the sidewalk and not keeping up with everyone else. I got ran over by a truck while I was crossing the street, NEVER heard it coming. 

Myriad reason could be at play here ... one can certainly be that the person isn't interested or serious enough; but that shouldn't be the default reasoning. 

 

 

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2 hours ago, Coytee said:

 

Maybe they're avoiding the phone because they think you have bad breath??

 

:huh2:

They sent me a text message saying they could not handle the methane not the halitosis.😁

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2 hours ago, The Dude said:

 I am a service manager that manages field techs.

oh boy ,   printers

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1 hour ago, Tarheel said:

No cell phone, no texting so it's a land line or email.  You guys sound too busy/nervous to chat anyway😉

  secretaries with short hand could't type as fast as some texters can  -

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15 minutes ago, RANDYH said:

oh boy ,   printers

Forklifts and mewps (mobile elevating work platforms)

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7 hours ago, Dave A said:

I just don't understand people who live in text messages as their world and won't communicate in any other way.

 communication skills with a cell phone  -

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1 hour ago, Jeff Matthews said:

Though I haven't done it, I think you can set up and share a Google (or other) calendar and make it public.  You can put your appointments on it, and they will appear as "unavailable" to members of the public.  Then, you let them pick a time on your calendar when you are available.  Then, the new appointment is made, and your calendar is up to date - all by your customer and not you.  

 

You can also use outlook, however I believe everyone has to be on the same platform, not sure with Google. 

 

I will talk on the phone to schedule an appointment though, certain things I don't mind talking about, only if its a quick conversation.  

 

When I was younger, my mom would be on the phone all day.  She would talk to my grandmother, aunt, great aunt, great grandmother, just about anyone alive in our family.  This probably jaded me with the phone calls.  

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6 minutes ago, The Dude said:

When I was younger, my mom would be on the phone all day.  She would talk to my grandmother, aunt, great aunt, great grandmother, just about anyone alive in our family.  This probably jaded me with the phone calls.  

No that's not it, just look at your avatar, think he wants to chat on the phone. doubt it 

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3 hours ago, The Dude said:

Forklifts and mewps (mobile elevating work platforms)

WOW

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34 minutes ago, Dave A said:

They sent me a text message saying they could not handle the methane not the halitosis.😁

--the middle finger syndrome -

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I don't like talking on the phone. My hearing is bad enough that I may not hear you, or I may hear you wrong. On top of that, my memory leaves a lot to be desired. I may get off the phone and not remember half of the conversation. With texts, I have something I can re-read. And if I'm texting you, you can't hear me peeing!

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There is a happy middle ground.  A simple, non-urgent text is nice, instead of possibly interrupting a person by making his/her phone ring.  If it starts to get complicated, it's a good idea to request to talk by phone.  Usually, when someone asks if now is a good time to call me, I just call them if it is.

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5 hours ago, Dave A said:

I am noticing more and more people who want ask questions about things like my tweeters who refuse to talk. We get into back and forth on emails and days pass and some progress is made but not as much as five minutes of phone time would do. The questions trickle in and then you answer and then the questions trickle back in and on and on it goes for days. I give them phone numbers to call and since they don't use them my assumption is that they do not want to talk to an actual human. At some point in time I just quit and say call me if you wish to continue this and then that is the last I hear from most of them.

 

  Have any of you noticed the same thing and how do you handle it? Personally I am getting to the point where if you cant pick up the phone and call me I am not going to spend hours with messages back and forth. I just don't understand people who live in text messages as their world and won't communicate in any other way.

I have this problem with my 2 daughters. They will text their fingers off their hands instead of hitting the call button. It's a generational thing perhaps?

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6 minutes ago, ClaudeJ1 said:

I have this problem with my 2 daughters. They will text their fingers off their hands instead of hitting the call button. It's a generational thing perhaps?

 

It stays in the back of my mind that when I am texting with a loved one, I know that someday I will want to hear that person's voice.. and will not have that chance again. 

 

24 minutes ago, kevinmi said:

My hearing is bad enough that I may not hear you, or I may hear you wrong.

 

I hear what you're saying... or typing. There are some people that I just can't hear on the phone, it's like they are mumbling. 

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56 minutes ago, ClaudeJ1 said:

I have this problem with my 2 daughters. They will text their fingers off their hands instead of hitting the call button. It's a generational thing perhaps?

Yes.  They then wonder why someone took offense to what they wrote which can easily be misinterpreted with the written word.  All 3 of my kids would rather text than call with the exception of my older daughter who loves to face time my wife.  She texts everyone else.

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