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On 6/24/2020 at 11:48 PM, dtel said:

Boudreaux went duck hunting with his friend and after the hunt they paddled up to land to unload. Standing there was the game warden watching and a little surprised as he watched them unload the ducks but no guns. He walked over and asked how did you get those ducks?

Boudreaux told him when we see them flying toward our blind we jump up and make ugly faces at them and they die of a heart attack. The game warden said he had never heard of anything like that and asked if he could go see it for himself. So the next morning they all met in the same place and went out to the blind. A little later some ducks came flying in and Boudreaux jumped up making a ugly face and half of the ducks fell out of the sky dead, the warden was amazed. He told Boudreaux in all of his years as a game warden he had never seen anything like that. 

Boudreaux told the game warden my wife is better than me at doing this, the warden asked why don't you bring her with you ? Boudreaux said we tried that once, she bust them up to bad.

 

I suppose before long we won't be able to laugh at Justin Wilson stories...

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2 hours ago, Marvel said:

 

I suppose before long we won't be able to laugh at Justin Wilson stories...

If it comes to people becoming offended by a Justin Wilson joke they should remove the stick they have up there butt and try to be normal. 

 

Just the word triggered triggers me.  

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For 6 years i haven't gone to a Sushi restaurant or Asian cuisine with my dad because he would always repeat the same punchline to the waiter/waitress.

"Can I have some miso soup, because miso hungry"

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 last year I entered a marathon. The race started and immediately I was the last of the runners. It was embarrassing. The guy who was in front of me, second to last, was making fun of me. He said, "Hey buddy, how does it feel to be last?" I replied, "You really want to know?"  so  I dropped out of the race.

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My friend  had the solution to forgetting his wife’s birthday and their wedding anniversary: He opened an account with a local florist and provided it with both dates as well as instructions to send flowers and a card signed “Your loving husband  ” For a few years, it worked. Then one day,  he came home on their wedding anniversary. He saw the flowers on the dining room table and said, “What nice flowers. Where did you get them?

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A man goes to the doctor, concerned about his wife's hearing. The doctor says, "Stand behind her and say something and tell me how close you are when she hears you." The man goes home, sees his wife in the kitchen, cutting carrots on the countertop. About 15 feet away he says, "Honey, what's for dinner?" Nothing. He gets halfway to her and repeats the same question. Nothing. Very concerned, he gets right behind her and asks again "What's for dinner?" She turns around and says "For the THIRD time, beef stew!"

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A husband and wife were dining at a 5-star restaurant. When their food arrived, the husband said: "Our food has arrived! Let's eat!" His wife reminded him: "Honey, you always say your prayers at home before your dinner!" Her husband replied: "That's at home, my dear. Here the chef knows how to cook..."

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A police officer in a small town stopped a driver speeding down the main street. The driver said he could explain why he was speeding, but the police officer said he was going to put him in jail until the Chief got back, but lucky for the driver that the chief will be in a good mood because he is at his daughter's wedding. The driver said, "Don't count on it. I'm the groom."

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